its been a crazy start to this week, over the dramatic incident, but thank God all's clear now, and things are moving along. started to feel weak on sunday and really, illness was just waiting to set in, which made me quite pathetic.

so upon reaching @ KL, the whole day was spent busy doing nothing apart from traveling up, some small meetings and dinner and karaoke for the night. There, I think it has been fun sharing with Jacqueline. and another dramatic end off to the trip.

all i can say i'm glad this week's pretty much short and over, since I took a day's of MC. Fell sick and i think it was signal to chill, which I did. Saturday night was a crazy night (i don't know how i survived) but yes, i was thinking on and off till i went to bed, opened and closed my eyes. The thoughts still stayed.

still quite very sane now, but all now I wanna do is just take a break. tired from the week, tired from looking on the sidelines and trying to egg him on. like what i always hear people say "gek-sei-yan". ahahah you kind of get the point.

but i start to realise that humans are actually really intricate creatures. they could either be driven by emotions (fear, anger, hatred, love) or by the environment (bad economy -> survival). i don't know what drives you, but feeding the drive, maybe one of the things that are ever gonna be keeping you alive.

anyways, all i can say, one of the most vital ways to stay sane in this crazily changing world and environment is by ensuring that you spent more time being quiet and being reflective. It helps keep your mind and heart, beating to a constant same beat or tune. Miss a beat, and something's not right, find the source then. Cause from there on, the actions should tally to whatever the mind and heart is trying to say.

Being busy or acting busy are just mere excuses of hiding things under the carpet and refusing to either recognising that there is a problem to simply, trying to evade a problem. Sure, run away from it and the rubbish in the chute starts multiplying till it gets too much, you never know where or how to start clearing, you end up losing hope of living another day, with the beliefs that tomorrow will be a better day. why do that to yourself? I don't understand, so i guess this should be a kind of discipline, just like exercising, that if you ever want to have a beautiful and healthy body, go do some work out, no pain, no gain.

like what i keep hearing at work "everybody expects someone else to change, but no one realises that change starts from the person themselves', and whoever said that, that's my boss. LOL. Quit whining, stand up, rise up and face the problems, maybe they're arent' that big afterall. Thank God i'm still very much positive and sane thank you.