Its really a lovely day today. its raining cats and dogs. so whilst i was about to head out today to get my lunch. (instead of popping instant noodles, i'm sick of it. its such a daily affair actually, that makes me appreciate real food everytime i see them on the table. and give grace arhhar.) took out my wallet, new player, mobile phone and my brolly out to the back of my place to get some food. roasted pork rice and ru dan. it is therapeutic walking in the rain with nice tunes in your head and enjoying the small dripples that fall on the side of your hand, your legs. then, on my way the neighbour had a grand goodbye for their departed. its the traditional chinese one, and somehow, it doesn't scare me but the fact that one day, we'll all be lying in there, and yes. your loved ones leaving you too. so random thoughts. but in that to come, i was more or less just taking time off to think bout the coming future.

changes be coming my way. i don't know if i can make it. as in i wasn't worrying bout the erm paper tomorrow. but more on saturdays paper. arhahar. not that i'm that confident in the erm paper but maybe because you know it is something familiar. that something unfamiliar pops up. i woke up searching for colour pencils today. *laughs. i'm just praying once again. arhahar. for divine intervention. like sunday's worship and sermon by Michael Ross

- God's not limited by His amounts to give, but your ability to receive.
- God works on what you have and not what you want.

it was more than enough for me to take home. arhahar, i felt rich. LOL, not by the hongbaos. i mean previous years i'll be happy counting on the money and think of the billion things to buy with that money. but no kick anymore. all i wanted to do was somehow to save money. arhahar. save and save. *shrugs. i'm not on spending mode cause arhahar. save it and head it off somewhere for a little holiday or something? *shrugs. but in the end a portion had to be used to recover a little player of entertainment that has to be with me, i need it whilst travelling. har. for mr silly said: "$180 isn't much for someone who loves/enjoys music" whoa seh. ok lor. he wins. arhahar. well said. :)

(i lost the green pod damn! thousand bad luck but as they were saying, xun shi pou zai or something lar. which literally means losing something but in hopes that it'll bring better luck. before the pod was lost, the audio technica earphones gave way, suddenly, the left side just had no sound while i was listening to it while heading to xiao gu's place?? arhahar.) *sigh. i got a microphoto from creative. yes i said thousand million times i'm a creative churner but when you want something cheap there's no other alternative. actually don't look at things in a bad way, that player can actually set a background of your favourite picture. BUT don't hope too much on the display. its only 65K from what jayson says. LOL. and the picture size better be around the 100 x 100 px. arhahar. which on your computer screen looks like your soompi avatars~!! arhahar. thank goodness i had picture of that mini sizes as avatars. and some that looks better then the usual. anyways. francis ng + myolie wu are on the screen.

*sigh. i really love that picture alot. arhaha *shrugs. i'm having francis ng fever lately. =) means i've got 3 movies of his sitting on my desktop waiting to be watched. all jiang hu shows. -_-'' but thats hong kong style isn't it? seriously, i think one last dance perhaps to me is one of his finest performance. i'm pretty certain. arhhar. =) after watching karmic mahjong and yes. i understand his intentions, arhhar. one last dance still =) and yar lar, triumph in the skies. what can beat that? i'm still slowly and i mean really slowly getting the great adventurer patience.

and enjoying my lunch when i got home eating. just savouring good old sappy chinese tunes with my lunch. with the rain out at the window. to just really savour the simple things in life that has so often been forgotten in our ever busy lives we so to claim. it was the best lunch in time to come, not that the food was that awesome, but it was the egg that was in my mouth. to stuff that entire half egg into my mouth. and reminiscing it like in my old primary school days. i still do till today. to feel the mashed up yellow yoke get mixed up with the egg white, as you try to get the yoke off from your teeth, and push them all in your mouth. that mouth of satisfaction. i was laughing arhhar. while i ate it. and at the same time wondering if he was having his lunch. *beeps the phone went. *shrugs. the number of coincidences we have on each other is quite a bit. i get reminded of him everytime i hear an eason song on the radio. harhahar. and his pod has the song i've been trying to find but gave up when i heard it on the radio. 3 Doors Down - Here by Me. It rocks totally cause of the acoustics. *grins. He knows what i did with that song. arhhaar. ask him if my rendition was good arhahar.

Now I think i sort of understand the feeling when God hears His people worshipping songs sang, i wanna sing a love song for Jesus! (and the listening part too) arhahar. that feeling you wanna send it up, that if God hears it? and sing it for Jesus, i think i came to terms when i'm worshipping God on sundays. its a different thing playing for God now =)

i realised not too long ago. somehow with Mr Silly around, that you just wanna play/sing it for Jesus. arhahar. i guess he gave that extra push to be there on this coming saturday morning in time to come.

and i thank the many people who has been encouraging along the way. the ppl on the forum boards esp the people on MJ.net. =) some soompi ppl. to KY + Carol there's PL, Jayson and the list goes on. arhaar. to ppl who squeals when they see pictures. that excitement ahha, and my excitement when i see them on my desktop. LOL. arhahar. i'm full of thanks though its just a stepping stone. *gaps. arhahr. i hope this time it'll really be. meant to be. to do the things of my passion and my desire. i know i wasn't idol chasing for ages, that self debate of "thou shalt not have any other idols" arhhaar. i feel rather stressed back then when i read that line. and i'll tell God, they're really not idols. you know i worship you alone, all along.

ahahar. the korean stars and hk actors have been around for me to grasp at how they go about doing their publicity, their work. the pictures taken, the style. the fonts. the colour composition. arhahar.i've been dreaming of something i daren't dream arhahra years ago. we'll see how this goes.

ok that's the thoughts for today. :) i'll post a picture of myself up. yay to decent pictures taken. arhahar. and rainy day pictures you see when you look out of the window before my camera died without batteries. *fists. i'm gonna head back to mug again. all the best to you out there, for your papers! its the final lap. sprint. run. crawl. whatever! finish this man. May everything go well :)

don't you think this picture looks like a scene of jiang hu. all black cars. lined up. fight fight! where's francis ng? arhahar. man watching too much of movies sia.

yays and thats with my revived canon camera. its taken in front of a mirror. whoo!!! that's JDG behind me actually.

whow. massive teevee watching today on da nian chu yi. seriously massive. not too bad.

- Ekin Cheung and Twins on Channel 8.
- Richie Ren and Michelle Yeoh - Fei Ying.
- Richie Ren and Mirium Yeung on Channel U.
- Malaysian Production on Suria.

won't say its the best of the lot but the thing was that it got me entertained. day started off kind of wrongly cause I couldn't wake up in time for church. *coughs. bad ah joy. slept till noon before i realise its chu yi today. so much so for excitement. arhahar. so much so for being on the phone till late on chu xi ye. Shou ye? yar. i was like telling my mom "Mummy, you sure got long life today, I shou ye you know". Mummy: "Really? But its your normal sleeping time what. shou what ye?"

*grumbles but i think its that malaysian short production that is leaving me to linger here alittle bit. i'm feeling some leftovers. ok cause for one, i believe its a short film but simple film. its on suria, but it had subs on but aiyo. the language is CUMPUR until cannot CUMPUR. some parts here you hear english, next scene, cantonese, next scene mandarin, next scene malay. aiyo. but i was watching on cause it talks on a real cool topic. bout a young couple, yeah, round 19-20+ or so. male's name is a chinese, called jason lee xiao loong. girl's a malay, all day long i hear sayang and oked (pronounced Orchid) diao. but whatever. ok from what i watch, i always watch show, no head, only got body and tail.

i don't know how the two of them met. but the chinese guy actually has a past. involved in gangsterism, sell pirated vcd on the streets, dyed blond hair arhahar. the typical beng lar, BUT erm, slightly better looking than the average. but i believe this guy and girl met when they were both really young. and continued on as they grew older. interesting part is that this guy i think comes from a peranakan family background, ibuk is a malay-chinese nonya. damn cool. likes the girl. dates the girl, goes out with this girl.

know what's cool about the girl? She understands chinese, i mean she's kind of china-fied malay. very english, likes to watch hk dramas and hollywood movies, likes john woo flicks. but with exceptions of keeping the rules of a malay in tact. no char siew rice. its interesting to see how both hit off. the lovey dovey, sweetness of being in the rain. i think its a malaysian thing, you know what they like to do? when it rains, no one ever thinks of running in the rain, no one thinks of the brolly. they use their really thin plastic bags and put it over their head. and both runs to the bus stops. and in malaysia, if you ever realise, their bus stop do not function that effectively and the cute part of the scene goes

Oked: "you know jason, i don't think the rain will stop soon".
Jason: "yar i hope not" - HE ACTUALLY SAID NO. he prefers the sweetness of the rain. -_-'
Oked: "sayang, i think this is a non functional bus stop, i think i prefer it out there"
Jason: "really? ok lets walk"

doh. funny but cute. puts me to remember when i was on that short trip to malacca, i asked mummy why do all the bus stops looks so dysfunctional. she actually told me it doesn't work actually, like "forget it, don't bother waiting for the buses" and i'm like "then why the bus stops?" she goes "i don't know". you know what i've learnt? they're rain shelters. =) arh. genius joyce.

but anyways, the show goes on to talk about the differences in their family and friends lifestyle but the cool thing about both side of the parents, the girls sided parents actually love Hk dramas i think. and looks at jason from afar and goes "aiyo, this guy so cute, can lar" kind of thing. and both actually does hit off without much objection from the parents.

so a scene comes and shows of jason's past. he deals in gangsterism, made a girl pregnant kind of thing, friend died or got injured cause of some gunshot thingy and might have to go to jail and he's left to look after his good friend's sister and old aged mom. said gotta work stuffies and reveals it all in a letter to oked. oked's kind of stuck in the middle, cause i mean he did make a girl pregnant, so things got shakey, she decided to avoid him. maybe it wasn't kind of meant to be thingy.

more twists came when Oked got a scholarship to head to england to study. so with all these issues, oked avoids him and jason keeps calling, flowers and letters. she leaves decides to kind of leave the past behind her, but in the car, her mom was telling her to read the letters and the mom actually told her if it was anytime to really decide if jason was the one for her, to just pick up the phone and call him. he was waiting for her call. guy was rushing to the airport to least talk things out with her, on his motorbike.

after much hesitations, she called him. first ring, no answer. second ring, was a long ring. he was on the roads, on his bike weaving through the traffic. and I KNEW IT. he kena langah-ed. got knocked and died. phone got through. and the conversation went. both talked and both sorted things out and she said she'll call him when she's reached. she was happy. but didn't realised he was already gone. oh my god. and yeah it is sappy but the end was a meaning of the saying that went "often enough the person whom you should treasure is all along right in front of you, but often enough you never quite realise it kind of thingy" i never memorise the stuff but that was the meaning. thought it was rather well brought through and i'm just waiting!! for more asian movies to go abroad and wharhar. :) asian power. i'm just obssessed over their movies now. :) maybe cause it is something closer to heart. but :) yeah. i'm still suffering remainders from the movie. oh wells. roll around and stares at sparky.

happie new year :) stay happy and eat all you can.

aiseh. life has been hectic i haven't got the decency to do any updates. one, its to hasslemore. and two. mou time ah. its been war with time all these weeks right up till friday! but its a sentimental feeling to have left the last tutorial class of ERM on tuesday. when lavvie went. "joycee, marty wants to date you for lunch". whoaa. arhahar. ridiculous jokes came out. well, least Pei Lian + Raymond + Martin + Lavvie had lunch together. :)

it feels like it should be celebrations but the only thing that seems to be hanging on everyone's mind is BI. argh* seriously annoying subject and trying to handle university applications is madness man. but thanks to someone who's been really encouraging. *winks. yes yes mr silly. if you all haven't known. yes we're an item now. i mean its crazy to announce to the whole wide world but that's if the wonderings are still lingering around. it feels never ending but that 3 minute video took me 3 hours to do it. i don't know man. if this is gonna pay off or not. i'm just hoping all will turn out well get a pass for BI which is takes really much more from you to comprehend.

for the love of the things you do, but is that passion ever enough to get you through, i don't know. all i know, get my ass out of polytechnic first before i land myself into another bowl of soup. mummy's birthday tomorrow and i'm thinking what to give dude. *sigh. but there's a good breather today. on top of mugging for BI. night skies at east coast whow. whoot. the wind. at my ears. the waves in front of you. the lights on the ships, the reflections off the water. and having someone beside to just chat chat chat. walk walk walk. seriously long since i've been honest to the feelings inside of me. and to the person which i can just say and carry the tag of boyfriend. its real honest now. and to the pasts. its a closure. big time for closure and seriously move on. i always said i've moved but arhhar. yess yess. it is time. :) and another chapter begins.

its a funny feeling altogether. arhahar. cause i know i usually wouldn't want to try. but this time its a tried and going in deeper kind of thing. wishing somehow, God blesses this one. arhahar. i don't know but that's all i really feel. usually i don't ask for blessings from God arhha. but i its different. i can't fathom the amounts of coincidences there are that happens and i wonder if its really what its trying to say, or its pure coincidences. the 2 songs heard today, i was playing it on my guit. then eason in the car. and monday's mumble of the name that i haven't told u before but he got the name spot on. Mr Q. diao.

i really don't know how this thing is gonna go on in time to come, but all i know is i am being heartful and enjoying the times and moments spent. will the saying "seek me first and ask whatever you wish and it will be given to you" apply? :) arhhar. i'm leaving it up to Him. anyway, thank you thank you for today. a very well charged ah joy. keeps me sane. :) in spite of all these. and I WANT TO DATE THE FOLLOWING PPL:

- BUDDIEZ (you know Jin Hui, Ling Li, Vanessa, Janna, Hwee Boon)
- My Heart Ibm Sweet Dudes for K. (Winnie, Choon Teck, Ronald) lol.
- and everyone else. arhahar. at random man. lets all go out mum mum. eat laugh play. sheesh.