I actually like this picture taken by Chass of me, cause I never expected myself to actually have such a sinister kind of smile. Purely cause it looks super playful yet with a tinge of evilness in it. The cardigan actually cost S$15 and the black top in it was for S$5. I had to say it, cause I thought it looks nice. - Shopping courtesy over at Malaysia and HK respectively. Sigh, I miss shopping and travel. Moolahs?

This adorable looking GIRAFFE (which Dubby insists it looks more like a cow / moo) To which everything that is shaped in this state, makes him think its a cow, is a 1 month old gift to Baby Joash, Jane's baby! Thought it'll be cute to spice up the little cot.

How practical moms will say its a dust collector, so I would believe this is one toy that can take frequent baths in the washing machine, and head for a couple of spins =D I just think its too cute! From the Dubby and me =)

This was taken during the Good Friday's event at the Indoor Stadium, before the Reinhard Boonke rally started, there was this baby in front of me, and honestly, I'm a person who enjoys the details of shoes, including baby's. It was just too cute, I couldn't resist! Those round and chubby shoes that just looks so awww, how adorable and cute. Least, it makes you feel happy!

a random shot of the bus stop outside my place, I believe this was on the way to Ben Chan's birthday @ Tanglio over at Central. *shrugs*

Pictures taken from the new phone, the first few of the lots, and most importantly, the first lot sent to the lappy. Won't say the camera quality is fantastic as compared to my old Sony mobile, kind of miss it, but i'll just make do.

From time to time, I look at the battery life that this phone sucks, the living day lights out, 2 days at most, and the phone needs a charge on standby and minimal usage. Back in those days, the Ericsson could last say, at least 2 days, which will still make a great backup phone =D Sigh, pda phones, lovely graphics, but battery life is just horrid.

This is food from the DESIGN SCHOOL canteen @ TP. I went back on Tuesday to run some errands after going to Tanglin Sec to submit and pick up some documents. I really miss school days, and I was thinking, "should I take up a diploma in visual comm?" Then again, I'm really not at all disciplined enough to last another 3 years, of endless late nights and projects, aging. So it was random, and I enjoyed the SAMBAL and the FRIED CHICKEN. Tee hee. Brings back alot of pleasant memories, like it or not, I will say poly had its share of fun times.

Ok so much so for all the pics =) There's more over at facebook, which makes uploading easier, but I have to complain, doesn't Windows OS have the function of "marking several" pictures, so I can just click all at once, and it gets sent to my computer? =( Had to do it manually, gah. Pictures were so-so only, not any impressed, but thanks to Photoshop, of auto-leveling that kind of adds and makes pictures bearable. I can't take Macro shots with this phone, and its kind of annoying me. Like a gay, nice looking, BIMBO phone. Ahaha, fancy thrashing a Windows OS, a bimbo phone, well I still like it, but i'm like cringing at the picture quality. I guess I'll just be happy with it, since I like the entire looks and feel of the interface of it all. Just the camera portion that can be pretty annoying, but then again, hi. There's the pocket digital camera. ahah! Excuses me.

So its been quite a crazy day since Wed till today, doing alot of comp work. Clearing the stack of work that just kept coming in, to clear it, is to up your speed. Shessh. I'm just glad to have made it through, only thing is that it may burn you out. Must remember what the older people always say, "more haste, less speed". I still haven't quite figured that one out.

To add a tinge of joy today, was having dinner with Chass and just enjoying some small groceries shopping - I really do think we both have upgraded into Aunties. Ahaha, and how she raves bout coffee, I think I shall try it later today after I wake up to see how it is!

Weekends are coming, I'm just abit sad on the part of Sunday that I won't be seeing the Churchies for the entire day, as much as I like. Its been 2 weeks, =( ahaha. Thanks to my leg acting up last week, I went home to rest. Now that its all rested, I'm heading to KL for the recce trip. Sigh. But nonetheless, there's Saturday BAG! =) Count the little joy! Time to do Jie's little poster. and koon. Nights!

Hmm, I think I'm starting to feel what Jin Hui normally says, "date me date me". And I finally realise the rationale behind it. Working life gets really mundane and the thing to look forward to usually, would be the end of the day, for starters. Looking towards the Fridays for main course, and the actual weekend, becoming the dessert.

Going on for dinner dates, hanging around with your friends, all add a piece of variation to the typical week. The cycle is slowly setting in and I'm feeling it. Hahaha. It gets boring, you'll get by trying to survive another week. *chuckles*

So what's your motivation? The money? The love or passion for the job? I wonder what's mine, but i guess for now, my motive is just to survive. Dubby was telling Mommy that he was gonna study, and mom said it was a good move. So I went, "hmm, since papa is so encouraging of me studying, shall I go study". Mom went "Go get your masters" I went "Sure, master of divinity?' *chuckles*

Ahha at first she went "sure". Of course I know her sure was so sure, all cause she really didn't understand what it was. Till I explained it was theological studies and she went "you wanna become a nun?" AHAHAHA. I went "Pastor! Technically I still get to get married". Obviously she's against it, cause even talking to sis, makes it sound like a crazy idea. Ahahaa. So who's gonna buy it?

So meanwhile, aiyo, i'm not hitting the books too soon but I did some research and just ploring at the different alternatives. At the end of the day, my motives of studying isn't a positive one, but to just really run away from trying to be a grown up and buy myself more time from taking up responsibilities.

This whole entire time since starting on this job, has been this sense of relunctance to actually grow up, stop being childish and really grow up and take responsibilities. A part of me has this refusal to grow up and part of it, is just a run with time, that just says "Your time is up". "Time to act and be a grown up". When everyone has a choice, who wants to take up responsibilities and tie yourself down with needless worries and anxieties and hopes and fears.

Familarity breeds complacency, complacency just breeds non chalency, and non chalency breeds utter laziness, utter laziness breeds a bummer. Sighs. For me of just moving out of the comfort zone I used to have, and envy those students, where life was so much more carefree, happy, yay-yays, and everyday is just a day of sheer enjoyment really. Your mind is always full of "so what do we do next?" ahahah!

Becoming this working kiddo, I'm really thinking of how to spend my free time well. Did abit of guitar and singing just now, spend time with the Dubby, since he had nights off, and just enjoying each other's presence in front of the tv and poking tickles at each other. Listening to his hearty laughters does make me smile whenever I poke his tummy. I cannot just imagine myself ending work, spending time in front of the tv and just sleeping, and repeating the same cycle the very next day, some 8-12 hours later. The mere thought of it kills me.

I'm actually listening to The Carpenters now - Courtesy of Keith :) Which i'm glad and happy, I listen to them when I just feel, I wanna be reminded of the past. The past of being a young kid, where mom used to play all these classic tunes on the radio. I was probably bout 4-5 and I will run up to her bed, and just sit, and take out the lyrics book, and read the words on it. Reading it will be one thing, understanding it will be another part of it. But I remember when mom got tired of my insistent questions of a million whys, she'll just ask me to be quiet, or to just ssh and just listen. And she'll humm and sing along, and I'll just sit quietly and just listen.

Nope I don't understand a thing, but i will remember the tunes, which I do till today. That when I listen to the songs now, I understand them now, connecting it with the tunes I heard when I was a kid. There's a certain rustic magic to all these oldies, that had such significant meanings and tunes to it. The style, the voice, the arrangement, it is easy listening, radio friendly, and smoothing. It is relaxing. Some other older bands that I like, includes Chicago, Bread, Abba and the Bee Gees. There was Bryan Adams too. But nah, yes, those are just staple classics as I grow up.

My moms has her playlists, my sis had her playlists too. Hers tend to the the soft rock ballad kind, of Richard Marx and tons of love songs. Which I hear too, that will be the usual tunes you hear on Class 95. All these are just my comfort zones, that I head back to reminiscene, my growing up memories, to remind me of myself, while massive changes takes place all around.

Who wouldn't love just sticking on and holding on to the never ending holes of your very own. But that will just not bring anything fun and adventurous. Like what Table of Glory said in yesterday's episode: "adversities are all stepping stones for greater things to be done", or something like that.

In moments like that, I just find comfort in music. In all things, my greatest comfort will always be music, for the different emotions. And it is sheer joy and enjoyment for me daily. Thank you Lord for the lovely rain, its not that hot. The weather has just been such a killer. =) Time for some QT and unwinding and sleep. For another day.

fridays are little bit more joyous, but i shall just leave my thoughts here before i leave out of the house for a meeting later.

starting to feel, wah, i should still be thankful for a job no matter what. (mom claims the pay's sad and long hours) ahaha I go "what to do?"

start to realise probably what pa's employees felt when they made their way down here for work. i'm in their shoes now, HAHAHAAH! Especially as they leave for home after work daily, especially for Jasmine, who at times, grabs a bus.

start to realie the world can get very morbid if life's 8.30-6pm, like not only me, but i see tons of people doing the same thing, i wonder, "everyone goes to work, heads back from work" - Is there anymore life to this, apart from the variation in activities like gymming, yoga, dinner, pak toh or simply, more work, to the tv, and raising of legs up on the table, tutoring your kids on their homework.

start to feel what YANG says all the time "omg, the weekends are here" to the "no, its ending so soon" ahaha. I'm feeling her pain and i'm in it now. The joys of fridays, and the joy that today, there's burning bush. Its the thing that i'm looking forward to, just fellowshipping and entering into the presence of the Lord, corporately. Sheer joy. Soon, I'll be looking forwards every bag? AHAHAHHA!

oh wells, lets see how long of this I can last. Of course, I need to survive at least 3 months. Hopefully more. AHAHA! =) Time to eat some food and head for Khatib. Gosh, I hope I'll be on time. HAHAAH! Normally am you know lately, amazing? Work gets your timing right. Cause you just have to. Its just easier that way. Life i mean.

Tadah, a new blog look and feel. I've been very bored of the white one that I think I've been using it for slightly more than a year or so. Or maybe less, I can't really remember, but it doesn't matter. I do need a change.

So here I am, surfing in the afternoon, looking at design templates and picking one that is pretty fun to work and edit with. Work was supposed to have started today, but apparently the boss got the dates mixed up, and so i'm supposed to be reporting for work tomorrow at 9am, with a meet up at Kembangan.

The boy had Nights Off but he has decided to spend it with his mates, so here I am, heh. Guess rotting in front of the tv with Mom, before we have our dinner. Anxiously waiting for "Red Thread" and I'm not sure, if "Fighting Spiders" are on. But they're all good local productions, so if you're free and have nothing else to do, watch the 2 dramas. They're good stuff. Watching Adrian Pang is such joy, love his English and not bad performance. Just more intrigued with how the story is going to unfold. Then probably with "Table of Glory" and maybe a couple or two episodes of HOUSE?

Spent the afternoon looking at the bloopers of House, which is funny and hilarious. Judging from the things said from Hugh Laurie, about his connection between his Bachelors in Anthropology, and how he ended up becoming an actor, was apparently with a bunches of lucky breaks. Does make you contemplate ahahhaha!

oh wells. time for dinner, and chatting up with Internet Mummy. =) Its been a long time. See if I do wanna carry on the post or it may just end here for now.

ah in any case, i'm just on HOUSE mode now, he's on my desktop wallpaper, and on my blog, cause I can't think of anyone else better? And the greatest thing, a WINDOWS UPDATE did to my comp, it actually resetted some of my shell settings, which means, the previous shell edits I did to it, is gone. It totally doesn't look close to Windows Vista anymore, all it looks like now, its a classic WINDOWS 98 look. AHAHAH, its quite hilarious really, and not that I'm not liking it at all. It goes with my current wallpaper theme, but it just looks dumb-dumb. Like not at all edge funky and cool, but just a classic old soul to it. Funny how I should be annoyed but I'll just live with the change, currently too lazy to find the files to update the shell looks. So it looks clunkish now. BOO! The TP-BIT people will probably know what I'm talking about, yes it looks like the Windows we used in school. The ones with the WHITE interface. AHHAHAHA. HILARIOUS! I'll just get used to it, there goes my lovely vista lookalike. This is Windows XP T.T

At the rate I'm going these two days, I'm gonna be growing sideways. AHAHAH!

+ I had a full dinner before I left out for Ben Chan's surprise birthday dinner at Taglio. Of mom's bak kut teh and cauliflowers, stir fried with carrots and rice. Strangely, I just felt mom's Bak Kut Teh last night tasted like her pigs stomach soup.

+ So off to another round of dinner, of pizzas and lemon teas, with fried calamaris and potato wedges and pastas. I could still eat. STRANGELY, and yes, as though my previous meal didn't existed in my tummy?

+ Today, I just had lunch and there's a donut staring at me, and I'm gonna eat it.

So this makes me feel bimbotic and blog whatever thoughts I have that is in my head right now. I do realise that my typing speed on my laptop is faster as compared to it when I blog via my phone.

I'm craving for a new bicycle. Mom threw my polygon away *pouts* on assumption that I no longer cycle, but the urge has come in now. Quite gian, maybe I'll just look at those second hands or something. Sigh. I'm a spendthrift.

Just got a pair of UE in ears and also my beloved, Martinis. Price was too irresistible to say no really. I <3 Uncle Jaben, lots lots. HAHAHAHA! And had excellent service, bleah. It pays to be a girl really *winks*

i cant say how thankful i am today.

cg fun was fun.

having buds around ytd was fun.

having ppl to share n talk bout each other struggle and spur another along in this walk of faith. brings great joy and delight for each one of you placed in t life. cause i start to feel you're just not alone and it does bring alot of comfort. thank you Lord!

i'm just on the mode of sleeping soon but yet have the urge of leaving some of my thoughts down. Lassie's sleeping right at the door, and looks totally adorable. So before I sleep and leave for driving soon later today, test's coming for the third attempt on Thursday, and I am determined and hoping to really end the entire agony of going through this long process, in another sense, driving is a sense of independence to me.

Independence in the sense, you have the luxury of roaming late. (ah, roam where) - I'm one of those that loves driving up near some scenic places, just breathe and take in the sight as and when I like to. True, for now there isn't a car that I can take, but having a license will be the first step of my desires. Let's hope the Lord's gonna grant me a pass.

But meanwhile, there's a million thoughts on my head today. I woke up in the morning at bout 11, with the sudden urge to play the guitar, so i did. Hence, i went on and on till bout 4pm. Missing all my lunch cause I just didn't feel like it, and ate it at 5pm before I left the house to meet buds to watch "Confessions of a Shopaholic". It really wasn't as bimbotic I would have expected it to be, and its a great lesson and reminder for all of us girls. Girls being girls after all, we all love shopping! (Who doesn't?!) Who wouldn't love chalking up bills, having the loveliest clothes, outfits, shoes and bags?! Having best friends and still being able to find love (The male lead was cute, all totally cause of being tall, decent looking, looks great in a Prada Suit with a Bow tie and having the most important X-Factor to top off the look) - THE BRITISH ASCENT. I'm really head over heels over man who speaks with that ascent, especially like HUGH LAURIE. Course, Hugh still stands at a higher ranking. Sigh.

Hanging out with buds is always something to look forward to, cause it will always be light hearted, open and we have all our crappy and lame stuff for each other. The simplicity that really makes us remind of what we were like in our secondary school, and should continue to stay the same to certain extents. Yes like what Janna wrote on her blog, I do share similar sentiments, but because we're a bunch who actually, if you do wanna share your deepest, its still reliable. I guess for now, we just haven't got that much of deep stuff to share. AHAHHA! But i had fun really =D

But I think the emotions today surged just really on second thoughts of how people have it easy in this house, and sadly, when I just try to gain a portion of amounts, I get it quite hard and difficult. I have no idea why people have the notion that I have things easy, ahaah. Sure if you wanna say, but look closely, it really isn't what you all think. So testers, please do not look at my address and think what you wanna think. Sigh.

Sometimes, I really don't know if the address I carry, when I write on my resumes helps, by giving people have those kind of notions of you. Ahaha. But in any cases, yes i think its just that feeling I can't stand it, especially in this house, just simply how things run, or people getting what they always want way easier than me. Times, I feel I slogged my ass off, and really, its just unappreciation here, that I just at times, prefer to just slog it off elsewhere, where least people show gratitude and say "Thank You".

So i took a time break off, from the things I see at home, and take a breather outside. Quit whining at a situation I jolly well am well aware of, and get used to the fact that if I do need/want/require anything, it will totally equate to me, working hard and getting it yourself. The point is just simply, the amount of insignificance I feel in this family, is just massive from time to time, at times I can gladly say, I have no connections to it, or to least I don't feel much to it, but just playing out my role the way I should for responsibility sake. But its as much as it goes, I suppose. Sometimes, I feel odd and ask question of my belonging, or to my parentage, but there isn't anything to ask, cause there are pictures to proof everything. At random, feelings of not being fitted in this place is being asked, but I can only say, I do get along better with my sister. Or yes, maybe its realisation of myself, being sick of people, despite being family, lives behind a facade that have been going on for years, maybe slowly but surely, inch by inch, removing all those seem to be images or ideologies, for a more truthful protrayal of themselves.

Maybe I'm sick and tired of looking behind all the facades, that I give people the benefit of the doubt, if they think they're happy, they probably are. But i think cause you can just see it, but at times, people just take forever for their problem recognition process, much less talk about the problem solution part.

Things are looking up, i won't deny that portion, but i'm tired of the revelation process. Ahaha, wouldn't it be lovely that I just disappear during this time, and appear again once everything's done? It sounds very enticing and I'm just dreaming of my next location to just leave on a jetplane, and get out of this environment here in this house, where its just very i-me-myself. Its very routined, and people just do the exact same thing day in and out. For me, just looking at them blows my mind, and i wonder how do people continue living the and doing the same thing they did yesterday, for today, into another tomorrow? Its mind boggling. I can't so i'll just do everything else different at random, for a tinge of variation.

All i can say, I'm dreaming of having enough moolahs, to fly my butt out of this place, do anything else, see the world, take pictures on an dslr. And I'm still a dreamer, and still dreaming, heading to dreamland now. Just so sick of things here.

I forgot to add how working on edits on 2 proposals left me working till late, and as age catches up with me, my body and mind seems to take a longer time to recover as compared to years back when I was slightly younger, sheesh, just hit the sacks. So enough of shit around.

ah hah! back from the recce trip, and i must say i enjoyed Port Dickson:)

many things to give thanks for, like the room wo rats in the ceiling above.

things that were supposed to be agreed upon with the parties went on fine.

must say its a real eye opener trip for me, to have learnt many things in communications.

so here's to another start and it has made me dream of wanting to do a long road trip, like the millions of students who does it during their gap year. sigh. license please? juz hoping to end the agony this time round.

oh and managing to talk photography with an enthusiast called Mervin:) he takes great studio shots protraits and macro shots. so he was there showing me his diving shots and his trips to eastern europe, like budapest, hungary, austria, slovakia! KAO! beautiful beautiful! and his egypt shots!

sharing all his stories behind the shots as i sat there juz listening, after a karaoke session with boss(gary), another colleague and Mervin:)

started out with juz gary singing (he sings got skill one wor) to me, to the both of us before the other 2 warmed up. and i realised i'm quite a jukebox, i sing such old english songs to the new ones. to the old chinese one. i was challenged to sing "How do i"? almost died but an honest attempt.

so here i am here, lying on the floor mattress, typing on the htc.

i'm juz hoping things to roll out fine. not too sure how i'm gonna fair? but its gonna be a good fight.

bill johnson time:)

Different times of the day, I will desire to listen to different kinds of songs. But when its night, I just love the sound of pianos going on and just vocals, to resonate, and it sounds awesome when I just sit myself in the room, where its silent, with just my headphones, and a nice comfy chair, with the air con on. Its quite a luxury. I don't do it daily, but i am doing it now. AHAHA. That's in the basement office, where daddy's chair is way more comfy then the one in my room. (which reminds me of whether I should place a big fat bean bag into my bed room) My goodness, in swanking red. HOO HOO. SWEE BOH. But then again, its gonna rip 90 dollars away from me. *sobs sobs* So I shall consider whether I do need it, but I think that's gonna lie on the top of my list once I ever get my full time job, pamper myself alittle, just all these lovely cushiony thingies around. They made me feel happy, to

1. Lie on it
2. Flop or just land on it
3. Run and land yourself on it

Brings alot of simple joys. (I do that to my parents bed till today) - Which totally annoys my mom all the time. Being so large and much older now, I still get a great kick, running and jumping right onto the arms of a kings size bed. Too large to miss? Could consider doing it on the beanbag. Tee hee.

Anyways, today's been a day whereby I got up at 1300. Didn't expect myself to be that tired, afterwhich, I had my lunch and watched "Defiance". Its been sitting on the laptop for some time, since I saw the short ad, via the big screen ad, while crossing the road towards Shaw, with Daniel Craig's face all over, its quite hard to miss. Plus, I'm quite into Daniel Craig. *grebit chuckles. (since someone has been using that term alot. and alot, means alot). PFFTS. Can't believe something that i use ever so often *chuckles* have found a new, revamped and cuter version. I'm jealous. But whatevers. *sheepish grins*

Ok so now I'm on House's Soundtrack. Gotta find more tracks from season 4 and 5. I love, somehow the music is soo different but definitely something I will never ever get tired of. Hee hee, that's most important.

And on Defiance, if you have a chance, do go and watch it. To marvel at the human spirit, the courage and faith to do the otherwise, then to just sit and await death. Its living out loud, "better to die trying than to die not trying at all". So yeap yeap, a movie that kind of jolted me by throwing me "what on earth are you living for". Daniel Craig as usual, being the oh so cute him (yes i'm being a girly girl), loveee it. I must say i was quite emotionally sucked into that show. So into it, bleah.

Oh and a passing thought, i just got myself another interview tomorrow morning. As random as getting a call at 930 at night just now, having a little chat and its some camp coordinator position. So kids and fun will be part of the entire thing. Just see how it goes, for now that's about it.

Time to head to my room and groove to house's soundtrack. Nite people.

Awesome day it has been today. 23.03.09 - It is Min Jong oppa's birthday. (Happy Birthday!) But a more felt note would have been my beloved, favourite band, right in front of me. To just be in the stadium today, was something to be thankful for. I wasn't that late, the opening act by whom I don't know, really wasn't that yummy, but when THEY came on, my goodness, we all went mad.

Thumbs up for an awesome crowd, sure we had fun singing along to nearly all the songs and especially to "Life in Technicolor II" to the WHOO OOO OOOOs, and especially during the encore. To get them out, the entire stadium was singing pitch perfect whoo oo oos. Darn good feeling, "Fix You" was pulsating, "Viva La Vida" was deafening, "The Scientist" moved me. Chris Martin being the usual him, especially chatty tonight and cutely hilarious. Will whacked the drums real hard, Guy looks quiet and reserved but course stunning with his new hair, Jonny with his signature riffs and overlays. Chris, thumping through the keys and strumming through the guitar. He actually took the guitar off his shoulders, and just threw it to the ground. I went "OMGOODNESS" but then again, how much does the guitar costs to them? Peanuts really, so its like a martin was just thrown to the floor. AHAHA.

Its better than "X and Y" in comparison to better stage presence, with their lovely do ups of lightings, pictures shown over the sceen, camera angles, and the ballish projector screens =) Which was during the previous concert that I fell in love with Coldplay, and the rest is history. They do real well live, and Chris makes me wanna go play the keys. All I can say this band is a bunch of brillants, both academically and musically. Will sings backup real well =D I only realised his voice during "Fix You" mv, years ago, that i realised the entire band actually does sing accompanying vocals.

It will be a day I'll remember, for such a fun time, especially during the "Mexican wave" with our mobile phones, and singing along sessions. The crowd was just awesome and Coldplay just lived it up. No one was sitting.

And yes, the wallpaper and pictures posted, are taken entirely by me. For keep sake's purposes. Thank you Coldplay, for such an awesome time! And a great crowd and for the Dubby, who paid half of the tixs. ahahhaa! Hope all who were present had a jolly merry good time.

A million thank yous. So many things to be thankful about.

1. That everyone had a great time at the Barrage and it went on without a hitch! Cause someone led it (winks winks) Great job and a great team backing the leader up. AHHAHA.

2. I met ALBERT! Again, this time its time no2. On our way home, just being able to share his vision, when these ppl just run towards their goal. He's doing architecture and when he talks about it, you just sense the love. My respect and kudos, i'm learning =) Press on!

3. Talk session with Uncle Julai / July. A figure of musician that I respect alot in church next to Uncle Tony. A man of such love for music, who lives for music, and cause of music, lives today (course with God's blessings and grace poured out upon him). Sharing his stories and past and experiences, was very fun. Especially the music taming a beast story. I'll remember it in a livetime.

4. Uncle Tony's cute session yesterday, from dinner, to the talk, his simple wisdom, I respect and give kudos, to his prayers. Thank you Uncle Tony =)

For all I can say of, is having a brush with all these passionate people, inspires me. Few hours time I'm going back to my much dreaded part of circuit. Somehow I just seem to clam up everytime I get in, I can do it, yes. But i don't know somehow I just get quite clammy when i think of circuit. Sigh, oh Lord, get me through man, just end this misery of circuits. And just be gone! Be done and get that license. sighs.

Its been a lovely time with all of you, the young people, worship, and a share of older wiser men, of Uncle Julai and Uncle Tony. And the after time with Keith, Timothy, Andrew, Alvin, DT, Chass, Pei Lin, CS is fun thanks to teaming up with all these people. =D

And shopping, walking around with Chass + Pei Lin.

It has so far been a lovely day today just resting. Yesterday was just merely spent orientating myself with my new toy, known as the HTC Touch 3G. Its a pretty baby, and yes, I love it, and I got it at a steal. =) Received pay and this is what I do to reward myself, and its quite a novelty really. Quite suprised at myself that I got a touch screen phone, cause I was quite keen on buttons in a sense, but not wanting to use the typical symbian interface. Not a fan of the iphone, nokia e71 seems fitting, but nope, ahaha i'm just not into Nokia. And hence, the decision with the HTC.

So yesterday was spent inputting softwares into the phone, its a little riced, with a new dial skin and contact book, that works like how the iphone works. Its quite fun really just finding applications for it.

Apart from that, today was just spent with the Dubby, we were just chatting last nite. Then lunch and tv today, its lovely to see how he has come to make decisions, very pleasant suprise no doubt! =D I thought it was gonna take a while but suprisingly no, so today was just a quiet day, enjoying each other's presence, watching an episode of House S5, on AXN, since i was simply too lazy to set up the comp to output it out on the bravia. Nonetheless, it was a good day, bringing lassie for a walk, while i was walking him to the bus stop as he booked into camp. Then showering lassie (cause she stanked), she's so adorable! How when I was soaping her, I was just looking into her eyes and she was just looking into mine! Those cute moments, sigh. Very lovely, to tell Lassie, she's been loved!

So here I am on my bed, looking at my emails, I've just got an interview on Wednesday, so lets just wait and see. Wondering if I should send more resumes out, I think I should but i'm just lying on my back. Check out the bruise on my leg that has grown into islands, and seriously looks like I've been abused. AHAHAHA. For the record, its the biggest bruise growing this big. All thanks to having really high steps at the EUNOS BUS INTERCHANGE, and I was just walking down the bus steps, missing the high steps, thinking it was a flat land (Like Bukit Merah Interchange), and the headphones on my head just plopped onto the floor due to the impact. And I went "OHHH MY GOD" not cause I fell, but cause my lovely headphones fell to the floor. Brushed myself up, picked my headphones up, and there was a couple staring at me. AHAHAH. It must have been a funny scene, but yeah. Its horrid, cuts and bruises and now.. The bruise have just seemed to grow. Have no idea if its supposed to have gotten better, or for the worse, but lets wait and watch. How fun!

So for now, its quite a limpy me.

i am proud to have got myself connected to the internet on my psp. that the device works only on wireless b. now i realise why keith said it was fun blogging on this. i'm doing this now all cause working on my comp now reminds me of being at work. typing on it just makes me feel i'm not at home, and sure enough to add a variation to my rest time after work to unwind. I cannot imagine just returning home after work to just eat, sleep and watch tv. Like now, unwinding with The Carpenters.

While looking at the blog, I saw 5 comments, and out of the it, 2 were left by the writer of "sweet tapioca porridge". It was quite a wowing sensation for a moment, and I hope Andrew does get encouraged by the good reviews and many good memories and feelings it has left among the many viewers of the show!

Apart from that, today has been a day strangely, of non-stop sleeping. Not sure if its supposedly to be the way it is, but it had been the same last week too. Whereby my monday was spent, just laying on the bed and resting, as though I was that burnt out or something. But last week I could have understood, it was quite a tiring one. This week, seemed normal! But i'm just letting myself rest, woke up in the morning at 9am on the dot, to book my seats for Coldplay's - Viva La Vida.

The first concert I'm paying for it (half of it to be exact) heh heh. So its quite an experience going through the system payment, which annoyed me, that I realised the name that I was supposed to key in, was case sensitive. pffts. The lovely person offering to subsidise my ticket price, is not other than the Dubby. Muahaha, its my valentine's day gift. He got a wallet. Tadah.

I'm sure its gonna be some of an experience after going for the 06' X and Y one. I guess that'll be it, gonna head off and continue reading John G Lake.

And with two interviews lined up later today, hopefully my energy levels will rise. Its been a larthegic monday! Thank You Pei Lin! Kudos to her for her introduction, however its gonna go, i'm still trusting, it'll be something according to His plans. Though somewhere in my heart, its aching to go for the design one. How funny. Bless your week ahead ya alls!

(Alittle bit of print screening, going through lengths to get this image, THERE!)

Yay, I must say how much I enjoyed this SHOW! Good grade local production, and while googling just now, I have already read 2 favourable reviews on this show. Not too sure if guys do warm up to this idea, but i'm sure it captures the hearts of the female viewers! It made my day, gushing at Darren Lim. Ahaha, somehow I think he gives me the resemblance of Tony Leung Chiu Wai. It could be due to the quiet nature or his protrayal, the silent type but yet still retaining their own set of charisma. My localised version of Tong Leung =D (I liked him for a long time, and i was like WOW-ing when he and Evelyn got married, it was such a fairy tale, and a match make in heaven so to speak) ^^ And he was soo cute in the show! HAHAHA. TOOT TOOT - DORKY guys are ever so cute.

It would have been lovelier to have my teevee partner with me, where we both rot in front of the tv, just sapping up shows. (Don't think he ever enjoys these shows as me, but he wouldn't mind accompanying me) - But that's not the point! HAAHHAA. He probably enjoys watching HOUSE together most. GAH. =)

Oh wells, once in a while, these simple stories and productions tug the heart strings of your heart, and reminds us of the beauty and the simplicity of what LOVE should be, could be like. Yes, it could be highly unlikely in modern day living, but to the whoevers who still believes in the simplicity of these love stories and is living in one, keep it going man.

To the white hairs and hand holding sessions on park benches and strolls on beaches, to the sharing of earphones on the buses, to the little support when getting on and off the buses. They are one of the sweetest fixtures around and commands the envy of many, and i the respect of mine.

To those who missed the show, OH THANK GOD, they have an encore version of it THIS SUNDAY. HAH! I love the opening titles, the music, the panning and the angles of the capturing of the scenes. Its really good :) More of these please? I'm in love with the style of filming, the music that goes along with the movie, and cute 2 leads, and a simple storyline, to watch it unfold, is quite some magic. (It would have been better without the ads in between, but then again, its called FREE TO AIR TV for a reason) - :)

Meanwhile, its been a funny day doing covers with Joyce, recording on her camera. I wonder if its already been loaded up? AHAHAHA. HILARIOUS. But it was a great time! Thank yous! Off to my audio techs and ipods once again. Sifting through those playlists that differs so much from time to time.

Now that the Dubby has reminded me, yes, it is time to go back and listen to some chinese tunes. =) Wassup with his recent infastuation with LEE HOM and KHALIL? LOL. They're MINE! =D

Hmm, i'm actually feeling kind of hungry now, and images of instant noodles soup floods my mind. Funny how you can actually tune your body to think of a particular something when it is triggered.

Am listening to Coldplay's other half of the album, Prospekts March, and Lost with Jay-Z is quite a waste talent, its amusing to say how rap can go on with Coldplay, but no, i'm still used to the way Coldplay is, alone.

So here goes, a new Bill Johnson pic added to the side, just a random thought of "the influential", apart from Obama, I should put him there. Bill's more influence than the other, since its quite a daily affair for me.

And yes, I've finally got a time to sit and chill, on this quiet night, at 3am in the morning, with total silence around the house and around the area. Dead still, with my feelings too, the anxiety's over in my hunt or would you say in my quest for my first... JOB. (as in work) or as in JOB in the bible? Ahaha, kidding, but yes. I'm still in my hunt, and there's no choice of giving up. You just head on and keep hitting the send button till a reply hits, and the rest pretty much hinges on people's choices.

Looking around, after being for 2 job positions, that spanned out to 3 interviews each, has gotten me to a state of ever wondering are you ever good enough, that up till the last decision making process, someone chooses over the other suitable candidate than you? I start to think, and ponder why I haven't or never been on the spirit of excellence. I'm always someone who's there but not yet totally there yet. Never took the time off or the discipline to hone something or put into use of more, something you've really learnt, that you ace and become a pro in something.

In so many things I can think of at random, I start to ask myself why on earth did I not pursue what my heart's desire were, that in the face of rejection did I not try and take an alternative route to be daring and courageous enough to pursue design at NAPFA or Laselle. Somehow, it never seemed to occur to me, till I was asked at the recent interview. Good question. Do i realise I can get so tunnel visioned and never seemed to try an alternative route to things or in dealing with things.

But the fundemental part, was that I lacked belief, faith and hope to have the thoughts to see me through. Afterall, my love for design probably was merely in its embroyonic state. To have come thus far so far, I must say I myself am amused and amazed to that someone bothered to look into that portfoliio i've got. I giggle and laugh, that passing thought that once crossed my mind, was heard and has come true. Not too sure if its entirely completed or there is still more to come, but I do thank God for what so ever progress so far.

That through this period, I realised I've learnt and lost somethings and I do have to take note. Some bad habits that have developed known as the maintaining of eye contact, something that I used to love to observe to watch of late, (I don't know since when), I've lost the knack of it. Till I received feedback and ah, realised. But its ok, guess you learn and take and make extra efforts in maintaining eye contact. (I must have placed too much emphasis on everything else, called the skies, roads, things ahead of me, i forgot bout the things staring right into my face) Amusing note. *noted*

Meanwhile, I'm still awaiting and have just sent out another 2 resumes and I remembered what Chass said to me. Yes, He'll have that perfect one ready for you. So yes I'm waiting and meanwhile, its alot of music, ipod and books daily for my company, and who could forget, my lovely stuffed toys around me for that added smile and hug.

In times when you're being tested in terms of your character, how will you ever react? I was so close to least retaliating through the raising of my voice, but all that ever came out, was a firm voice that stood my opinions, ideas, and feelings.

Today would have been a lovely day, one whereby I give my thanks and head to sleep smiling, suffice for me to just enjoy whatever the day has taken me to. Only to be greeted with a bunch of totally uncalled for remarks and maligns and labels and words used that really wasn't the nicest to describe things.

Pulling someone I call i love into the picture was not needed, as if there were any plans in me going for my further studies, wouldn't be any other areas for now, unless probably theological. My mind is empty for all that it is for now, and he was throwing home his point, with his voice raised, "you should never stop your studies.." Going on and on and blaming every distraction that seemed to be.

I think i've been insulted today to a sense, that I'm wondering which part of me ever look like I switch and change my partners as frequently as I change my underwears. For this entire ridiculous conversation, it didn't make any bit of sense, cause it was clear nothing that I ever was gonna say, was ever gonna be heard.

And hence, I'm not feeling any sense of sadness or bitterness but more of which i'm trying to make sense of what in the world has just happened, which has caught me totally off guarded. I merely just left my door open, and THIS happened. You wonder if you ever made the right choice of leaving it open.

Flabbergasted, and left totally clueless. So much so to my lovely quiet nights of just wanting to get on with the devotions part. Just great. Neither am I sure which way I should be feeling right now, cause I'm totally left hanging in mid air. How very amusing is this.

Time to sleep real soon, and get changed into my PJs is all I can ever do for myself.

Ouh, and meeting CLEMENT SEE on facebook, after all these years is a pleasant suprise! Thank you God =D Let me see, its been some good 8-9 years, and we only met once, and the next time is like, NOW. AHAHA =) Time to sleep joyce. Nites.

Its the new year and since last year i guess, new year has pretty much COMPLETELY lost its meaning and as I grow even older, the only thing I look forward to is cause of my mom's awesome and fabulous cooking.

its quite sad that festivities loses its meaning after a while, and i've come to realise that the Chinese New Year is pretty much a custom and tradition done in respect of our elders and seniors and relatives around us. It gives people a reason to make time and gather, and as the years go by, I realise truth sheds a light onto the hearts and intents of people's.

If the family is one whose hearts are as one, pretty much, even with the dismiss or the passing of the elders, they will meet up together, (sort of in memory of them) or simply, as a real get together time.

Its disheartening when new year regular meet ups that was done as a child, no longer has much traditions and meanings like it used to be. But I can only take heart, and be thankful that in Christ, there's this bunch of SIAO KIAS, ahaha who meet as and whenevers, and enjoy the time just hanging out together and never wanna say goodbye, and just look forward to the next day where we could all be together kind of thing?

Not saying my other friends aren't fun to be with, but most of them I know are into the regular vistings and having funs. Maybe I should be malay and it would be more fun, cause they visit their friends houses too!

Oh wells just a thought or two, and yes, sitting on Tushan's car, makes me wanna drive (WHEN AM I GONNA PASS!!! LEMME PASS!). And he has just tempted me to look into getting an Omega. He makes it look young, and not so old. And Martin is just ever so fun and Commando always is so tired and quiet!

Thank God for all these people lah. Everyone of you, meanwhile, have an awesome new year, even though mine isn't that awesome, doesn't mean I can't wish you to have one! God bless!

Whahaha, HOPE FLOATS, HOPE NEVER FAILS. Oh I'm just so excited to see what is gonna happen. Gotta make a post on this isn't it, and yes PRINT SCREENS. I could only took these few screen shots before the facebook buffering on CNN went haywire. Gah, thank God for the Channel News Asia coverage and also for PRINT SCREENS function. Tee hee, people should do and vote for the cutest or most charming president. Barack definitely comes up tops, but the India's prime minister guy, also quite charming, cause his ang moh, mixed indian. Sigh.


and a wallpaper to commerate it. Sigh.