hellos bloggie. shifting to this new site, and layout ahaah, i realised nowadays i blog much less. ahaha i just keep it in my brains and live another day. or maybe i just got lazier by the days and my blog entries are actually getting shorter (or maybe it depends). and i start to wonder what on earth do i do nowadays. i'm a much quieter person! or rather its spent on the tele, books (read, papers lah, books lah, mags lah), spending time with my music (listening and on the guitar), sleep.

i actually stopped surfing much on my minjong and dong gun oppa somehow. things just stop on the forums and ppl on mjnet does wonder where on earth am i. i wonder wad on earth am i doing. i just don't surf that much anymore actually. so funny, then what do i do ah? ahaha. chit chatting online too. i think i'm just aging rapidly it is. i used to do more, like do everything that i stated above and add on to the forums reading and catching up. i guess i'm sleeping earlier nowadays... oh ohs.

anyways, this week has been rough. when relationships face the test of time, it is the ultimate test of each other's character. and no like i asked mom "guess who's making me worried and bothered this week?". she went "the one standing in front of you lah. (which was darius apparently)." he went " *hands raised up* no no no aunty, that was 2 weeks ago" ahaha it's really funny. i went "he's right, its not him. its the other 2."

like what hwee boon said to me today, it was like a revelations of my situation with jinyi. till today sui yi talked to me, like how our relationship between the both of us shouldn't be affected cause of 1 guy. i was silent ahaha "uh." response, listening.

1. i think both our relationship was already different from the moment you went into full time work. we were different. you wouldn't share your deepest anymore. ok that's fine with me =)

2. and the most important and basic basis of all fundamentals: it isn't bout the one guy, but its about your attitude that i see it in you doing it to me, and it seems to be reflected to him. the way you treat me, just feels you don't trust me anymore. or maybe we shared different ideals already, i will never seem to understand you today as of NOW. you're all grown up, and i'm still a full time student. by all means. i don't argue when i don't see a point in it.

3. now that we go your way, work to your ways. you share as and when you feel like, giggle and laugh as and when you like, i don't ever mind. do whatever you're happy now, i won't budge or give you advices to seem like i'm nitty gritty-ing bout everything. i respect you now, and you do what makes you happy, as long as you're happy.

4. things seems to be a big problem now. but lets face reality, it was already a problem i saw long long time ago. it wasn't a problem for you last time, now that it has become. i tried to do what i can still, but then again, if only i recognise a problem, isn't that making me a bitch of being a problem maker? ahaha. things can go for a change now maybe, now that you see there's a problem.

5. i'll clarify for the last time again. whatever i've done this week was purely on the basis cause i cared. and that i had no and zero agenda on trying to tear anyone up, cause confusion or anything. a listening ear to anyone in need even if it means going out of the way, applies to practically everyone. check my records, it really is for most ppl who knows me.

6. i'm glad both of you are out of the rut and things are going a-okay. keep that going, cause this way, both of you really are happy this way. when both of you are not okay, you both really are not happy at all.

through all this time, i'm thankful i've a great guy sitting beside me, (after the $2.80 incident) ahaha, it's amazing how the week after, we spent time talking and just realising and acknowledging one point. there's really no one that understands each other, than the both of us. that the days of late has been amazing in a sense, the kind of level of trust and belief in each other went up a notch. its amazing and i'm glad and happy and just really enjoying the passage of time and life with each other. funny how things got this far, like soul mates feeling. like best friends but like the bestest of friends ahahah!

he's been amazing today too. he led worship today, "i was really trying not to laugh". ahahah, like the long pauses we had, and how the rest of the young adults just took it in the stride, have some laughs, he tried teaching a new song today. ahahaha. not bad lah, and i was his back up guitarist. he takes 80% credits lah. 20% mine, to the little guiding lessons on sat night wor and the day itself, ahaha. i was trying very very hard to like "joyce, darius is leading' ahaha. i think i'm too jia lat, i lead too much by feel liao. he goes by "ok this way, this way" ahaha. i do remember there was 1 part we contradicted, but in the end somehow things just went his way for once and mine at the end or sort of. for being lost in a new song and finding the way round it. glad it was still nonetheless good. bringing the point across, that he wanted something "NEW" and "Fresh".

jacob went "dont scold him ah" i was like "no lah how to scold, he boss today." ahahah. but more than that i realised why (being the usual typical perfectionist me too) was fine today. i've seen his efforts and his struggles up to the day today. i'm very very proud of him =) cause for my case, it took years, he took months. and it was lovely spending time listening to christian songs sitting together, as i shared the songs i listen to when i'm bent on my knees praying for him (and of course when life gets hard) before he became a christian. how i used to break, and keep questioning my desires. it was just great, being able to have a partner to share God together, talk God. Love God and serve God together. is my greatest joy and the prayers of my life. course thank yous God but also to the darling. he's been a darling =)

and apart from the darling, there's jacob and glenda, JJ today, for being such encouragements. it was like a total booster of joy. so worn thrown insults. i'm glad i was given grace to take it with a smile, not cry, not break and still have manners switched on. to take insults at my face with grace, move on. cry not. is me. Shaun antics adds smiles to your face. Pastor Keith, for remembering our little sharing on missions. i tell you, this God is amazing.

taking photos for the directory teaches me to quit wallowing in my little worries. ahaha and do it and encourage ppl to smile! its fun, taking photos especially for the elderly. how appreciative they are, just touches me.

be running circuit tomorrow again, and my teacher's attitude is a test of my character as much as it is of his. lets try this again. oh god give me style and give me grace. - Coldplay: god put a smile on your face. he needs it man. ahaha.

and thank yous winnie, you're really really amazing. what will i do without you? God bless you, lovely.

and i tell you my current favourite pastime, is to sit in the hall. with the speakers at me, listening to my pod. man it is life and watching house on 42" hdtv. such life of pleasures to me, (its funnier when there's the darling beside me? he's all tense and like "ssshhh!!" and i try to blab with 100000 commments to distract him hahahah) sharing same loves, ahahaha. and how he provides me with my pleasures, of house. GOD. i'm blesssed really.

too beat to say anything, or write anything out. as for today, i'm totally zombed. partially because of the things i had to do today, photo taking can get physically draining. then the early mornings talk, totally trying to explain $2.80 to darius took literally the living daylights out of me (plays muse - time is running out) "you will be the death of me..." really really tiring, and it doesn't help in itself when i'm actually focusing my thoughts onto other matters.

explain, and today morning, trying to get into the problem definition phase. i was really wondering what was going on, why he was behaving the way he did (if that is called understanding). theory is, its easy to just get discouraged and sit back and moan and say and feel and think as though you're the only one on earth feeling the way you do. as much as i try to talk him out into "don't give up", "put in your best", "try again", "its ok". only could do so much, i'm limited in my means for i myself am trying to figure out and think on certain matters.

i came to a conclusion that in alot of times, as for myself as a learning lesson, sometimes and alot of times, things ain't going to what we perceive it to be, doesn't equate that things are not working. if only we learn to open up and see more options, maybe we'll get to understand things more, see things better, deal with them more effectively.

somehow i had this sense of just letting everything go, ahaha. stop pursuing, stop trying to get him out of his little rut hole all over again. let him do what he wants if he's comfortable in being in the rut then so be it. i'm like really zombed coping with my own things, ahaha. for the tough couple of weeks ago, at home with mom. now that things are better-ing up, like a source of her release of anger, she feels better. i'm patching myself up in a sense of rethinking everything i'm believing in on, working on, and putting it out onto actions. the entire process of things, what have been done right and what not.

seek comfort that i tried my best, and even if i fell flat on my face and failed, i know i always tried my best. =) like what my darling winnie said, feeling so drained and tired today, of the sum of the physical and emotional toil going through. I'm fine =) just totally in need of sleep NOW ahaha. rest rest rest.

with everyone saying i went down again, i'm like oh no. did i? ahha, i've been eating! hard to explain no matter how much i say, i believe ppl are thinking i'm suffering some eating disorders. ahaha NO!. i love food, but its just i haven't got that love as much as i used to, and i'm totally fussy over food these days. (want bread - find the right sandwich) - and i wonder ahaha how much of nutrients im eating and getting into my system!

anyways, today's been an amazing encounter with God. with what JJ said, worship during YA, and the slow walk to my cousin's place where it rained, and turned to a drizzle. amazing. spending time being quiet, taking the pictures and looking at the youths getting around their retreat program was definitely therapeutic, that it makes me focus on the things i can do than to the things i can't do a thing about =) fun and makes me feel soo old, hanging out with carol lim siang joo. she's insanity defined all packed into one. have to sleep, my eyes are gone. =.= to equal signs.

alright, finally with the new posting and a new look. after trying it out on the yaggers blog, i thought i should do it on my own blog. its sexy, feels wordpress, pretty much the same. After debating for some time, i'm just staying onto blogspot for old time's sake. its 4 in the morning and yes, gotten to everything i want, the looks, the feel. pretty much, only thing that is lost is the pictures on the side, but for a change to all those faces of my favourite stars, ahaha, its new widgets on the side.

yes i've been away for a godly long time, too many things happening, can't have time to narrate each and everyone thing that has happened. but on the overalls, june first two weeks, has been caught up at church camp at malacca, then to hong kong. i will by all means claim malacca was a more fruitful trip, spiritual wise, getting to know more people well and God was there, and most of all, experiencing the presence of God. Worship was one of the best of my life, being able to play for God is 1, and secondly, the entire atmosphere, no kidding.

Hong Kong was a mere scenic trip, apart from the peak and madam tusseud which i enjoyed, the hotel room, tv, making my daily observations, food. that was pretty much it, yes shopping shopping shopping but mainly, was high end stuff. as they say, too much of a good thing becomes boring. the only brand i love. starts with the a. agnes b, that's bout it. ahaha, i bothered. too upmarket, no clothes to match, no look. pass baby.

end may would be busy with the preparations with the church camp booklet. after coming back from hong kong, was driving, meeting up with friends and the usual. its quick my holidays are coming to an end, and to a real different beat, i didn't work this time round, part time wise. which is unbelievable.

gotten myself a new baby. =) my new cort guitar. its been around for weeks but i just feel too many things to blog, don't know where to start, can't be bothered. and the stacks of things to blog is in my head, but no efforts in writing them out. pictures, alot. abundance. but no way man, uploading on blogger one by one is a real killer. facebook's got great photo uploading capabilities, one of the smartest i've seen so far =) will see, if i'm in the mood. it takes me aeons of years to upload pictures.

been up to singapore flyer, took some great shots all with mom's compact camera. gotta get it from her, prolly later today, cause its 4.15am. The boy just messaged, cute boy. woke up to just message me he fell asleep after dinner, but hey hey, i'm cool. tired just rest, ahaha, i'll still be around isn't it? =) sleep tite you.

so that's all i've got there, for this week's been busy with all things guitar. after having a hard and painful time with my baby - the guitar. (i gotta name it man, but i haven't got a clue). cause of the action of the saddle being to high, it needed adjustments. so thank God for a professional you can count on, who works from home, did my guitar, its all the way at hougang. so a day, delivering it down there. another day down to pick it up, had dinner with jayson (his treat) - being i'm totally broke this week, on splurging on this baby. so he paid, how sweet. hee hee, and me, thick skin lah.

then was another treat last night, by Agnes. Jojo omma went to Japan to meet MJ! what on earth, some hell of an experience. and mj.net ppl asking for me, yes i've been dead. honestly, not that i've lost interest, but time online to surf and read and be updated, hasn't been on the list. where i'll spend it watching more dramas, read more stuff (i'm into political stuff of late, especially all things obama and the presidential election between the republicans and the democrats) nifty stuff no doubt, and great english. then there's my guitar to attend to, and my boy to attend to, and church. sounds busy huh, but i seem to be able to fit all things in, then there'll be time for school, school work, church, and friends and what have you. forums haven't been on my head (apart if i'm gonna buy/sell barang barang).

and before i leave, i must share how sweet this friend of my brothers, (how not close i am to him, we barely talk) and how well i talk with his friend. HE IS SO AMUSING. Name's michael (seems like a common pinoy name) he's half pinoy and dutch! chit chatting with him this morning, he's saying how my ascent is amusing, speaking english but with some chinese ascent. DO I? eeeee. but yeah, a guy who hangs around with alot of girls, and loves shopping and window shopping and is a guy who looks after his skin alright. i think its the mixes, cause he says he mixes with korean and japs in australia! (keke, and reads a japanese NWV, its the new world version, yes he's a Jehovah Witness) -only realised it today morning after chatting today. ahaha, oops. i just chanced upon it. he's on a stopover and flying off to japan soon. what a life. sigh, i'm really really envious of him.

and yes i must say, go australia and make a living. part time there earns at least $15 an hour in a kitchen (which is the lowest paying jobs). WHAT ON EARTH?!!! thanks man. i earn half of that over here per hour, and say hi. to the pathetic pay we have over here. he's strange, he eats spicy. LOL. NOT AUSSIE. man i wanna go aussieland and japan tooo. but first of, korea!!!! dang. he says i can if i save up. i think not on my life, now? LOL. maybe its a thing when you grow older? whatevers. its raining! tucking in like. NOW! niteys people. (and to Jin Hui, Vanessa, Ling LI, Janna - Stop quoting "Its been an amazing week!" its no longer anymore muahaha) - and sorry i couldn't be there today, i really would have, but the guitar restringing and cleaning was really tiring. yes, its the classical, i learnt from scratch, and clean some good 3-4 years of dust on it, its my second round, cleaning it. sigh. what a day and week man.

ps. the posts are bit messy but some of you may see why. its linked to the other pages along this blog. so ignore them =) it'll be fine with a couple more posts and edits. i love this new page.

I'm not a mom, (quite obviously) but this is my favourite kid amongst all. The way she smiles and the way she goes around doing her own stuff, amuses me. The way she talks, I love spending time or just sitting in a corner watching her. Keryn Wong aka Ah Bi!

She sits on my wallpaper too, I just love this picture soo much. It really tells you what being a kid is, being a child is. The joy, the happiness. To me, she is really quite my joy and my therapy when I just need a mind to just be quiet, enjoy the fun, simple time when i spend with her.

Kids are really contented simply, the joy she shows when her daddy bought her a new pair of shoes. Aahaahaha, i was just watching her. =) Or maybe she reminds me of my small self, I should put my pic of my own self up. hmm. You dian xiang leh. ahahaha!

She came around and sat on the beanbag with me, i was praying, seeking prayer prompters i'm supposed to be praying for someone who needs some joy in their life, i was about to end my prayers and this little girl came over and landed herself a spot beside me, and smiled. Course I smiled back at her. Its amazing! No other confirmation hor. Heh, ahhh, missing her already. When she goes "come stay our house lah", or tucks my hands and holds my hands or just lying on the floor staring at the celling or pointing at each other's noses. She really is a joy.
I'm always intrigued by cats lately (Yes, partially from the people who have taught me to love them) Bak Tuti and yes, the boy. =) Its a cat that has grown heaps and bounds, I first spotted it pouncing away from me, to take cover in the drain when I was walking home. Its soo cute!

Check out how well it camouflages with the tree. AMAZING!
Don't know how many of you are amused by skies, but i'm amazed by it. The softness and swirls of it, and how big the skies, makes me feel how small i am. I loove feeling small, cause really, you really aren't that big seriously. Looking closely, looks like a stickman from above =)
this is a golden retriever, (at the peak, at hong kong again) i was desperately trying to get a shot of the doggy with me. Its trained so well, that even if you release the leash, it isn't gonna budge an inch! Taking a photo with it likewise, it would move away from the lens of my camera mobile. (for your information I do not own a compact camera) - all you lucky people who do own one, count your blessings! i've got my trusty 2.0mp camera of my SE phone ahhahar. but i do own a larger camera =X just not handy to bring it around lah.

i should put a picture of both of us. its taken a long long time ago, i was debating to put or not. (like a 10000 reasons why i should?) - I found a good one today, should be thankful i have a lovely (majority of the time), funny, pretty much caring boyfriend lah. without glasses! of our favourite pass-time of sitting together, just chit chatting away like girly girlfriends. I'll see him again for another session soon i think. =)

Fool around with your mind. I'm gonna mess with it. AGAIN. taken with my mobile. Take a guess if this is a 3D computer enhanced graphic, or a mere, natural, real shot taken of a building. Obviously took this for a reason. I'm very intrigued at how visual it looked while I sat at the open area just outside this place, known as the viewing gallery (if my mind doesn't fail me) ^^ its darn cool, as usual, always intrigued by cool architectures, and white panes and windows gets me amused. its real darlings.

This is another shot taken by my mobile, in hong kong's peak again. Its unbelievable how i feel what defines heaven+earth. seperated by a mere sky, so high it seems, but seems to be real close to us in this angle. amazing shadows. awes me.


There's gonna be a page set aside, just for my pictures. For someone told me, i'm a messy person, lumping all pictures and blog together. So alright, might as well dedicate a page to my pictures and talk bout it. =)

The view from the peak, all pictures here for now are by my mobile phone. pretty amazing =)

ling li

vanessa

janna

jin hui

vin

Deepashini

kim yee

winner

yang

peilian

lavonne

martin.lo

justin

lydia

cheyrl.tean

clarence

clement

ehndrew

jessica

lijin

rachel

peilian

sing ngee

jayson

weezhun

siewting

emily

elmo

its been an amazing week. a totally different one being totally immersed in one after another church stuff. pretty madness, but i'm glad somehow all things have all falled into place. now that i'm finally done with the church video, i can be freed once again and to do more stuffs in time again.

thank God for making all just fall into place despite hiccups here and there but i suppose it happens with the glitches. i get pek chek but thank God that i'm brought through today =) being able to enjoy some rest, after having a great time yesterday's wee hours with macdonalds and the company with shaun, chas and sammie. this week is sammie's week, i love the sharing sessions with the girls on how much to give thanksgiving for the week, and certainly to give all thanks to. for having a great buddy to work with, to share and listen. and of course kirstie, ah bee and uncle henry + aunty carol for their place, food and all. its been amazing and definitely new, being through the prayer wall. if its a green light sent, it shall be it. i'm just hoping all to fall into place and take and behold everything that He's planned. Its my heartbeat and my dream and wish since young. that of late i could see more and more of these visions and pictures. i really totally hope i'll be able to carry it out of course, with God's provision. i can't believe how anyone could see these rough sketches i got for myself but the speaker did and that's what i think its due to be called divine intervention. i can't believe it myself.

but alright, i'm heading to bed man. its 319am and i really need time to sleep. though i'm itching for house. 4th of june's coming right up and i really don't know what's gonna happen man. all i'm hoping all's really gonna go well. God bless your oncoming weekends. have fun!

if i was a guy. trust me. this entire blog will be flamed with hokkien vulgarities. i don't use them. don't see a need to use them. never resort to using them but today is seriously. "BO TAI BO JI TIO SHOOT". and i was thinking to myself, forget it, it doesn't pay to be good.

as i'm feeling bad enough over the laptop thingy i'm supposed to be shopping for someone a second hand laptop. who's been bugging me since my exams started. OKAY~! Now got time, i finally managed to source a deal, made contact everything's all going well. people's last sms went "negotiate 550". and that was it. i've sent 3 more smses "still want anot?" - NO REPLY. OK. Today dealing. STILL NO REPLY. calls* "i very busy now leh. no want the comp lah."

i just thank God for Him providing me with the source everytime i wanna get something ahaha (cheap cheap) Think He knows I poor. Then the seller usually all very nice one ahaha. This time also no exceptions, seller was nice. Thought he'll get angry (He has every right to) but not. I just honestly. honestly in my whole entire life say this and say this again (and i believe Darius has been saying it. week in and out) - IT DOESN'T PAY TO BE KIND.yeah i hear him telling me alot bout it. and i ask him "so how? still want to be nice anot?" he says "ya lah then? You can't just because of these idiots then become unnice right? What to do?" yah i nod my head in agreement. today, i kena. Do i practice what i preach? YES. sadly so i'm consuming my own anger, gonna dissipate it out in the court later with my darling BBALL. HI!! (ya dub2's favourite line and i giggle hearing myself say it omg. what's wrong with me) grrr.

anyways, bottomline no matter how much annoyance people have been to me when i'm trying to be nice and provide people with some service, i like it or not, its still continually getting out there and serve even if it means people are thankful or not because good gestures doesn't mean it gets reciprocated into a heart of thanksgiving by the other fella. (not everyone is like winnie. she's so thankfull. so cute so funny. i love) i gladly lugged my first sem's notes down for her. (didn't expect to be that much, i got study so much meh? ahhaha) went for driving, kena suan "eh ppl normally one session can learn parking leh. (its parallel parking) you so ji ling, how come cannot understand". OK LOR. TIO SUAN AGAIN. hor lah. gimme chance i ang moh kia. whahaha learn lesson in chinese, should soon get it. i hope lah whahaha.

anyways, thank God for winnie, for yesterday madness 3 hours K. so cheap $8 + 1 utterly syrup drink and yah sing all your songs. at least they've got Tim's songs ok. so impressed cause of that =X ahaha. and we 2 singing all the emo songs, and yar sing ah mei's songs. voice can literally crack whahaa. but otherwise fun. she's the women man. and ya next time "lady in red" again ok! think we're gonna make this weekly man. it is so shiok. go home 1115pm bus 30, on the ecp is shiok. bus is smooth, just at the right speed to enjoy the city lights, with the singapore flyer and the cbd buildings lights. so nice! and of course zhang ah you singing in my ears. piang. my hero lah.

and for kim yee. also listening to my nonsense i'm so calm ahaha. =) gonna play with my cj07 whahaha. :) its so lovable and cute. i'm itching to play basketball lor.

i have to leave these thoughts somewhere. my brains and hands are tired so maybe it takes less effort to actually hold a pen and write to concentrate on holding the pen and writing on a straight line and just reach for the keyboard and just type. it is a luxury with a personal computer to do what you want, when you want and at the comfort of my lavender room.

i'm sneezing and wheezing like nuts since 10pm. and its coming back to haunt me. but whatevers. life still goes on, the notes will still have to be read and the readings have to be continued to be read and i will have to continue to study.

i just wanna say that many a times, maybe we see this thing to be something we really like. and we really want it. so alright, we work really hard and try all our means to get that thing that we really like (in this scenario literally it was a bag). i wanted this particular model of bag. course there's a reason behind it, i believe in having that bag suit me, and not the other way round. means i will require my wardrobe, and ensure i have the clothes to suit that bag, so i'll feel safe having and owning and carrying a bag that will meet my everyday casuals.

i voiced out my likes to my darling mom. since God knows when, and the people around me might have heard me nagging. i really love that agnes b voyage bag and it has to be that classic series. ahaha. i fell in love with it at first sight since i was in hong kong. and still love it till i returned and still love it =) apparently somehow, despite showing the pictures to my mom, she got a different model of the bag.

she told me first. honestly in all my days, i yearned for it for some 5 months. well not that i was certain i'll be having one. (who in the world's gonna provide me with the money?) ahahah. and most of the time i was considering on my own to get it lah, (like why bother people, go get it yourself) ahaha. mom volunteered to get it for me somehow so i really was like feeling like some elated 5 year old kid approaching my birthday, mom's gonna get it for me. GET THAT THING FOR ME ahaha.

felt my heart broke when she said she bought another model. (it still does now, but not as much, i'm living with it). cause 1. apparently she said she changed it once so no more changing of bags. 2. she utterly dissed the model that i soo loved. she's paying for it. 3. just take it. well not that i don't like the model she eventually got, but its a wee bit too over for me, being wee bit formal and it needs me to adjust to the baggie. (it works the other way round not this way. and I HATE IT. ahahaa) Fashions always that way hey, the clothes suit me not the other please. and this is my way and attitude and style, hard to conceive but it took me 30 mins to quieten down after my mom broke the news to me. i was silent. sad. thinking.

course she did offer "you like the other one so much get it lo. i use this one" and i felt she don't really like agnus b. (mean why would she ahahaa its not her range and style, she's more up market k thanks. when she have so many other BETTER alternatives in her closet). i said "no there's no need". and there you go this marketing student who's been reading her notes trying to basically explain product differentiation to my mom. like how the product differed and why i chose Agnus B. LOL. cause it's me kekee. but i think after going one whole round she prolly doesn't get much. but anyways i just wanted her to know and get it off my chest.

"i upgrade you mah" she went. yeah k thanks, i was asking myself "yeah with the extra monies paid, why am i still sulking" ahahaa. i just have to get past the factor of. "hi joyce, your beloved Agnus B is sitting there. and i can't use it." 1. my outfit is just to lah sup to go with that baggie. 2. i'm seriously not used to a slightly formalised bag. 3. maybe you could just wait till i work full time (Like WHATTTT? NOWWW!!) ahahaa.

in all i just got over it. and live with it. (though i may still be learning). i just wanna say maybe at times things may ain't to be what you want, to go to what exactly you want. and an alternative might be shown to you to see things and accept things from another way, it could be a better way in a sense if nothing much is lost.

i mean if i were to look at it in a better sense (definitely not self consolation), i got the big idea of getting that Agnus B bag (if i profess to love the brand) ahahaa. then it shouldn't be a problem anymore. ahaha. (think long term -> formal attire -> SO IDEAL FOR WORK -> Smile.) yeah i try to think of it that way maybe it really isn't that bad. ahaha. get over it joyce! i think i did its just a damn bag. aaha.

so it all depends which side you wanna look from it. if it pleases my mom. ok! it pleases myself (hi. i'm an Agnus B bag). so everyone's happy. and i should be. so its still thank you mummy. ahahha! and thank God for the provision and the so whatevers that took place in the shop it was embarrassing ahaha.

its been a long long time since i'm so full of thanksgiving but to feel this feeling. i'm very thankful. thanks to this little girl. called ah bi.

looking at her sit around, hold my hand with her tiny hands, she pulls me around ahaha. and asks such sweet questions that warms your heart "joyce jie jie, you coming to our home?" i don't know how to tell her i initially wasn't going to her place, but thank God for her parents ahaha aunty carol + uncle henry. she's really the only kid i have 100% pure fun, i laugh and giggle and get amused at her every single time, i bother to get pushed around by her. one i bother to go distances of bothering to explain things, talk in her lingo, ahahaa. bend and listen to what's she's gotta say. cause every thing bout her amuses the life out of me ahhaha.

see her play with duplo reminds me of myself, we played together, ahaha explaining to her, that her toy has this mouth on the wheel, ahaha cause its bob the builder edition i had such fun looking at her stash of treasures to what kirstie said. she's so proud of it, a sparky lover and a barney lover, and her green smelly toy and her banana ahaha. grrr. miss her cute antics. she's known as the polka dotted pyjamas princess. she just loves princesses. ahaha, her smile, her giggles, i'm giggling on my own ahaha and finding joy in her as i carry on doing my mundane process of mugging soon.

i was sooo tired today. zombiefied. but i thank God. Bak Tut came down i can't tell u how much i miss her. i miss her presence, our sweet lovings ahaha her mentoring. after some 1 year, yes i finally meet her after all the talkings on the phone. she got me my birthday presence, and cooked my favourite soup. it made me very very happy, just sitting down hugging her ahaha. =) so thankful of today.

chitter chatter and she realises that my house haven't changed any one bits since she left 5 years ago, and yeap, ahaha and she reminds me "don't get easily angered ah" and i'm remembered bout myself. reaffirming each other i'm cooler now, she takes things much easier now. times do change a person i guess =)

chatting with darius after that, the first time he accepted a theory example that well. maybe he'll find new courage to face the struggles he face and find a way to accept criticism from this harsh world he is in. if you don't even bother to attempt to try, you will never know. criticism is a spur for self improvement, not a mere outlet for ppl to push you around. and i always believe criticism brings out a fella's character. it breeds character.

oh oh i have to write this. anyone knows how happy i am playing the armani range of guitar. the taylors. thanks to uncle henry's stash of toys. playing alongside with him leading, and the team, consuming fire has to be the highlight, where joyce foo, me, clare and ruel goes "lets play the bridge" it has to be either one of us wanting to feel this God high, and the first time the desire to try new stuff. its great man. i really had one of a high high worship. and uncle henry's right, we ended right HAHAHAHA, a big laugh for my bloop ahaha. =) thank you thank you to the team and to uncle henry and to all who made it all possible, to our God we all so love. great sunday, great weekend, i'm high and rolling over with christian radio. ahhaa and i found another love. "once again" - matt redman ahaha. yummy =D

and some lovable pictures of ah bi! courtesy of jessica.ho. heh =D i love every single piece of these shots. i have more but just some of them. =D


i love this pic lots and lots and i feel so xing fu ahahah. i'm mad =D

ok march's over. april is in. and soon it'll be mid april in this ever so crazy mad world. that is spinning one day and a day just slips you by, and just what have you done. all i'm glad and i can give all the thanksgiving in my life for, working with people especially older guys can be such a frigging chore it wastes and takes the living daylights out of you. its over. thank God. almost over, and come thursday when service quality's presentation is over, its time to wind down the curtains and raise up the flags to tell the whole world you're at war with the books. and come 8th may, everything's over again. this life is such a mundane chore. and a cycle that the only thing that can be happening that is lovely and nice, is watching the simplistic things that are happening. like take for today, the little kids running around the playground at true way pres kindergarden's playground, the tots in their yellow outfits, i used to be like them!

play time was on bicycles on 4 wheels, holding a bucket, filling it up with water, and we'll run to the pillars and paint it over with a brush dipped in water, to see the gloss and as kids, you get the entire thrill of it. police and teeth on the playground. to think back on my entire growing up years, i'm the person who don't fit in groups, or rather i take a long time to fit into 1 group, cause i'm a personal person. and i'll leave school with that handful of friends. ahaha. and talk bout the same ppl over and over again.

social misfit probably, can live with it. bo chup bout the world, but chup everything on this bunch ppl who have made me know that i am warm on the inside. i never believed in it, ahhaa till yes in secondary school. the bunch and this bunch and a list of names into it. that's why i do develop quite funny relationships with some from time to time, ahahaa and especially if its of a person of an opposite sex. too shou can become a topic but its just realliy, similar.

to whatever it is, i'm always thankful for this bunch of people. i totally agree with what dear winnie says. ppl come and go. people do change with time, but to take heed in the times that was once shared amongst the people, is always good enough. it goes it goes, it doesn't last, i guess somehow some other things might happen and you find another piece of gold along the way.

i think this walk of life is tiring alot of people i love around me. don't worry, you're normal. its the same over here with me too. and you and to the many out there. cause it can't get any mundane as we are and maybe its the stupid cycle of march-april. that 1/4 of the world is passing by and urgency might start hitting our goon heads, and we start realising the stupid cycle. and the obstacles facing us seems so hard to get by. seems impossible. but have i told u i prefer adidas to nike. cause the tagline works better. impossible is nothing. exams are coming up, another semester to an end.

as i was walking home today from a change of environment and cycle of my room and laptop (i love to break them) ahaha. i was at my cousins. giggling doing my crazee antics of my stuff toy animating, voice overs, rolling around with their 3 mattresses rolled into one, i reminiscence the times when we're young, and i get it at their house ahaha. less laptop, more cable. (i lost touch with tv God knows when), i still love them, and i'm dying to finish my air city. dramas makes u feel, have emotions and feel and think for the character that least helps you understand and feel some situation and feel for others better. cry if its a release of this world's stress, dream and fantasize for a moment of the sweetest thing that can happen. we're afterall humans, well i think dramas beats gaming, with the real emotional factor in it. or maybe its a girls thing, but guys should find a drama they like. content vultures or emotional vultures (*winks. yes dub2. i hear ye *giggles. we can be sooo similar from time to time yet so different ahaha).

i'm dying to get my butt into gramaphone, to get MUSE's HAARP album. ITS SMASHING. i'm in love with them, i mean their hits are all over the place in their discography. heh, its all brought into one in an album, in this crazy world, music just becomes a necessity, and it means good music. i heart muse. they're alternative, strange. spacey. but i like. i can't wait to get my hands on it, and the joy of bringing a cd home is back, ahaha 1 month 1? kekeke. one republic was last months'. ahh. hold on people. missing the people around. :) tuck in and hugs my mario + da tou. and the room i love. its nice. hee hee. oh and i have to say. i got complimented. ahahha. haven't received soo many compliments in 2 days, take it and makes me smile. thank you.

its been a long while, keeping to meet datelines, school, people, life. swarmed by hecticness. ahaha the purity of it gets quite maddening. so as i laid in bed today purely resting, (I rarely spend my sundays resting) cause its off to church, but i think i just cannot make it today. since last night as been this entirely annoying and new experience of this nausea feeling. no i'm not pregnant for the living daylights of me ahahah. its so random, it just came on after i left edwin + sharon's place and it just hit me. then met darius the silly boy ahahah and i was just sooo dead. had fun with fifa on the xbox at edwin's place + cutting cute looking clouds, brought some kind of joy and i have no idea what hit me after i left. like some kind of bug or something, i just felt i wanted to puke. but no nothing came out. and its that constant damned feeling.

could be some kind of wind in the tummy but urh i had mummy's pill to treat it, i don't know if its working or anything, feels better with a bit more rest in till this afternoon. trying to figure what in the world is wrong with me ahaha. not eating well, sleeping's fine and i can never get enough of sleeping AHAHAHA. apparently the joy of eating has dissipated into thin air lah. pretty sad, and i think again, after digging for more information on the web over my retarded condition ahaha (yes it feels retarded) could be some stomach flu or buggie, or just the usual case of stress related stuff but oh yes, maybe it is some stomach buggie, since that day. AHAHAH. that day of preparing the barbecued food and tried it, it could still be around, cause it just felt like that other time, just not so acute in comparisons of pain.

oh my oh my. when's me gonna find back the joy of eating ahaha. and apparently eating to me is a happy affair, and i think the best time i ate was last week when i was with the 2 xiao char bohs. carol + jinyi. ahaha maybe they're my best medicine to ki siao and then just eat. ahaha i kept complaining i was hungry (yes you can rarely hear me saying that) and eating. OMG. this week i'm having this strange bug. ggrrr. wassup man. i wanna meet that bug in my tummy and tell him off. "hey, pick on someone your own size you know" - cause you're so unbelievably annoying. this niggling feeling in my tummy, grrr. that i probably have to go around hugging a pillow. feels better no doubt but the stinking feeling still remains, that wanna puke feeling ahaha. not that strong anymore. but still some remnants of it. hello mr? what's happening ah. ahaha.

anyways so much so, i thought of Pei Lian today. on my bed as i was resting thinking. yes when i rest i will have my bunch of random thoughts before i drift off to another round of eyes closed sessions. i thought about what she said and she always tells me this when we met for dinner just on thursday night. this line floats and keeps occuring in my mind. "joyce ah, stop thinking too much and worrying about others" in a sense of the dilemma to the dates of my 21st birthday party. and that pure line again, as i look at my condition of my state HAHAH in some bits of shambles. please please tell me which fella in this world doesn't enjoy eating ahaha. it got misplaced that i need to find mr eating again. (i think its a mister cause technically guys stomachs and appetites are like bottomless pits). maybe i've been running abit hard lately ahaha, its time to relax, roll around and be crazy again. somehow lah huh. *stares at my toys* maybe i haven't been playing with them of late and talking and sherading with them with my crazy antics. maybe i'm sucked up in this whole cycle of life thingy, ahaha that i'm now staring at it. ahaha sitting in a lovely corner just wondering and thinking and watching the world go by. its much funner observing things than being a part of this madness from time to time, but it makes you learn and get sensible ahaha. the irony. oh wells. i hope all of you are doing well =) sending out my loves. on a lazy afternoon and work stares at me and i fall flat at my face thinking about going about doing it. hwaiting. ah joy. =)

and the picture with Pei Lian edits. i just kopped from the girl =) i had fun girl! thanks for the kai tong. ahaha ^^ and the good old days. if i could tug her in my bag and bring her around at school and work together once again. the best team! ahahaa. and my side thoughts to winnie aka pooh bear. whahaha. ajah!

actually i got nothing to blog about. (hmm i like this arial font) though this reminds me of report writing but arial gets pretty comfortable and pleasant on the eyes to me.

but i read winnie's blog. i bth. too gan dong u know? i wanna blog about it one moment, but also wanna write it to her. ahaha, so what am i supposed to do 2 things simultaneously. ahaha keyboard on my right hand and pen on my left writing on a piece of paper.

all i wanna say to winnie here before i end my last few conversations. i thank God for today. that God made lovely people. Thank God for today's flea market, i think it was pretty much a success. that inadvertently i could be there at the thrift corner to help get bags for the ladies who brought the things home. oh thank God, that me and aunty carol needn't be packing up and racking our brains on which to keep and not. thank God for uncle henry who came and helped lugged the things up. for amanda =) silas for his silly antics like OMG. ahaha. and liyang for being so funny he's so easily tickled. and ah bi. her runnings around and rumblings just really touch me in a way, there's really so much for her to look forward to and shouldn't i be doing the same?

yes for the dozens of lovely people around screaming at the other end selling food lah drinks from the cooking to the places everything =) its an experience.

starting out again, coming back to be more regular in attendance in sitting and sapping in the sermons, more regular qts and sessions with the one who made all possible today, Him above =)

winnie is what i always say, she's god-sent. likewise, she is the person who's always there to say its ok and its normal. her letters i hold so dear to. and i'm gonna reply, she makes me smile. feel all warm and fuzzy in there and when we're together, it totally feels like we met somewhere before and we just need a place to sit down and just go on for hours. talk bout anything. windon is so cute. winner is so sweet. love, life, men, work. cute guys never escape the both of us. our life. loves and lovings. it'll never end and like she said. may we do this till we're 60. life's finest moments like this, are priceless.

thank you lijin (tu-di) lol. =) for the time on the phone we could both always share ahah, bout our currents and we share our dreams its so funny. he'll make it big one day. mr hong. name spills all over the place i believe ahaha. get well soon.

jayson, i'm not not replying you. its like wad u always say. bwg ahaha. yeah. i do read your sms-es. what do you expect me to do when it appears in my phone, cause i read. all i do, keeping you in my prayers. =)

dub dub - throw your oscar away then you know. we're both like running individuals ahaha. pushing each other to run down or out, grab each others arms and pull each other up, keep running. tired rest. sick, recover. go get your rest lah. saf makes them into real time oinks i tell u. but its ok i'm turning into one soon too =)

thank God for the many loves. and i need my buddies love. i miss my buddiez. janna, vanessa, jin hui, lingli. and to the many others. come come meet when we ever can. life is mundae without lovings. bless you all with a great week.

these week by far has been ok not least till the end of the week whereby i seemingly seem to just revert to my favourite habit of keeping myself up in the room. stay inside the room and sort things out in my mind before i head out there and face more people, and especially him. i just don't wanna flare and throw my foul, lousy mood. which did worked out as i decided to skip church while he went to church and i just had myself in the room. quietly, laying on the bed, awake as i stared into space and try to get an explaination to the mess of emotions that i was having to myself.

pretty burnt out on saturday alone for goodness knows why. i think its from the rushing of one place to another, from home to vivo, then to vivo to bukit merah for dim sum lunch with jie jie, mama, jinyi, carol, jarrett and sukina. then to school then to little india. for dinner with his family. bushed. dead-tired i could only stone. and when he ended up talking to me, it was monosyllabic. and could only give the answer. "sorry, i'm tired". nothing really happened till we he was driving and we started talking. bout a small problem ahaha, he had, we both were sharing our opinions on the matter and somehow 2 tired souls talking and talking, i got pek chek. cause it just wasn't getting anywhere. should just stop, cause i was tired aaha. enough. and i got short fused as i went back to my room and could only think of a conclusion before i headed to sleep was purely cause i'm angry at myself. pek chek at myself that i couldn't do more to give more answers despite feeling tired, and giving better opinions to problems. just not giving enough of 100% eats me.

and at the back of my head, monday's coming. i don't know what am i fearing when i'm not the one sitting on the metal table. can't say i'm worrying either but its just so mixed up i'm in a mess today man. i only realised something was wrong with me after the conversation with him last night and he said "you're tired go to sleep" which was really true. then as i quieten myself down i remembered aunty chris asking me at church "are you ok?" didn't really strike me. not least till sunday came.

messed up cause when i feel inapt, when i can't give a 100% to the things and needs around me, when i know i could do previously, eats me. it ate me, and i'm still thinking whether would things be different if i did allow myself to listen to that call. but i'm that beat, the only provision i seem to be able to do is text. listening seems to be so tiring latley, i'm failing in that. not cause i don't wanna listen to people speak of their problems, my attention span shortened. ahaha. i'll get the gist and minus everything out.

with monday to go, tuesday's driving and saturday's dateline's for amca coming. and the video edits is still sitting behind my head. i want to clear everything of this, and not clear but make it a good one. God knows what's gonna pop up but i can only hold on by faith. things will go on, be done on time, and i'll be given the capacity to handle both the mind, emotions, body and my spiritual self man.

its strange when on the 15th i was giving and digging words of encouragement from God's word for my mom, and how on saturday and sunday, i'm putting it on whole for myself. and just stick to listening to Hillsong's - Lead Me to the Cross. i'm bushed. brushed. down and defeated. the feeling of laying on my bed just feeling nothing for this longest period of time, sorting out my thoughts to what exactly was i feeling.

i had crazy ideas. that is it i perceive to give high expectations to the things i do, and that i wanna outlive that expectation or maybe its just me to want to just give my utmost but then again, from time to time, i'm such a playful, quaint crazy fun fellow. its like i was trying to get myself connected to my serious-working side that somehow was lost lately, but i think found again. i don't know if its supposed to be a good thing or a perceived bad thing or whichever. but i suppose at the end of the day its just me.

and as i sorted out everything (this felt like the period of fyp strangely. where there's the work and people relationship going on) ahaha. the only saving grace i hope i could do was that i did my best to do what i could. i can only pray that God heals. i'm trying to not let it eat me. and as i stand firm and try to clear the incoming workload of work and starting to feel the major stress setting in. i'm sucked on to this mono cycle of life. i can't wait to get out of this. where its the holidays where i feel life's more than what it seems.

man damn i'm relunctant to get work moving. looking at the time. and i need to be up by 845am. and sleep. this is gonna be interesting. but at the end of the day, i'm thankful for him for at the end of the day, i was feeling little comforted. he said watching me jam the keys to the keyboards seems to help me distress and yes it does. i need outlets man. or i'll just coop up and just allow myself to be eaten up. and as i always use the words of encouragement on him, i received them back from him. so very funny. ahaha, but its true, may God's grace and strength see me through, its what i told him week in and out. ahaha. and its used on me. he's been lovely of late. its pretty unbelievable from time to time, compared to the crazy past 2 months. when he's thinking and has his senses working, its pretty unbelivable (positive side wise) and unbearable when the senses aren't working. that he's impressive both yesterday and today. pretty interesting like new things unrevelling and i just observe. grown to handle his emotions, situations so much better (and i wonder maybe leadership positions makes people think) and i should feel everyone should get a chance to be one and serve others and they'll learn to be sensible beings. servant leadership and not autocratic leadership i'm talking bout.

anyways, bottomline, he's been lovely despite this entire rundown i'm feeling. and i'm really thankful =)

i'm an emo dude this night. today's been a different day than usual choosing to spend it over with Carol at her place. bwhaha. 2 crazy monsters, digging at the new year pineapple tarts that are sooo good and peanut snack we finished the entire first layers to the peanut cookies. apparently my throat is still fine. had lunch, xiao yi cooked one. since i asked the little tiger if she wanted to eat her yuki yaki her much awaited and anticipated lunch but her mom's cooking and i had my share. yum yum =D

so cable watching with 2 persons laying flat on the sofas and couch. flipping through the channels. apart from feeling happy being able to watch Miu Kiu Wai on teevee cause "dicey business" is showing, i watch SHAUN THE SHEEP today. OMG. its so lovable. played bit of phoenix wright, hoping to end the damn game so i can start another part of it and i'm so stucked on zelda. as though i have so much time to play game. i don't ahaha. its seriously only the in betweens. travelling or slack time. that seems to be slipping and getting less and work stress is piling ever since the cny period ended which i wished it never ended but fat hope. all good things come to an end. *plays chris martin + nelly fertados "all good things come to an end".

slept. HAHAHA feeling larthegic at the sight of work ahaha i just end up all lazy but will kick up engine and get some reading done and go figure done. sigh. work work work. ahaha and i see the edits required to the video, pim pom piang all i hear is time time time. ahaha. i wished i never needed to sleep ahaha. solves everything but piang. we're only humans. aiya to whatever, hold on and i'll just say. "God will provide" and period.

been reading up on blogs seeing how people have been. that i kicked up some time to do the things i used to do so regular that i haven't did for at least for the past 4-6 months. soompi and minjong.com forums. korean news i rarely have been updating myself only with loads of tvb. AHAHH. starting up the engine for 2007 have been a quiet year to all my beloveds, not much dramas or movies i'm looking towards 2008. when i watched part of 07's Blue Dragon Awards, i could barely recognise it, cause it was really really not that glam, not much hype and it feels quiet. the eerie dead aura. sigh. i miss janggie, woosung, minjong, raewon, jinhee, seeing their familiar faces man. anyways so much for that.

i've been dreaming today on my way home. that i realised that its already end feb in no time (my god can you believe it?) we'll reach the first quarter of 08 in no time. i'm dreaming of the end to being a full time student. (when you're a student you wanna be a full time worker. when you're a full time worker, you wanna be a full-time student. and as usual, the grass is always greener on the other side). and i had this dream of back packing europe. yes and the desire gets stronger as i get older. get the money, get some pals. and move. as simple as that. i'm hoping and hoping. God will make this a cg thing. somehow, we said this before randomly, but i wonder how many still remember on this pact, some time long long time ago. i'm still holding on. and it came back today.

apparently my mind was working like a camera that seemed to clicked by shots. pictures of what i've seen janggie at rome. seungwoo at some parts of europe, at the train station, on the boat, and all. i had those shots and i felt i wanna be in one of them. and i realised at times, being a guy is so much easier to just want, pack your bags and go. girls people will keep talking bout safety not safe and all. it gets annoying when i just think of that that my train of thoughts just came to an abrupt stop. halt. period. and i'll end it with. "maybe one day". spoiler.

anyways, yes i am a dreamer when i was self reflecting on the train ride home from carol's place. and always have been a dreamer. working towards getting them real. cause they aren't that totally impossible ahhar. its fun. just keep moving baby. cny's been rather normal and for me, i always call it quiet. apart from the noise from little tiger (seeing her so bubbly reminds me of the old me) who somehow seem to be quieter as the years goes by. blah. she's the loudest and she really ain't need a loud hailer to be loud. her voice is loud enough.

hoping to get by, do the things i need to do. to everything the best to what i can do. and do the things that i've been called to do for. go. (sleep's calling me. heh) some work first eh joyce. be good. i suddenly feel older today somehow. i don't know why but as Minjong oppa was singing in my ears, it brought back memories of the jump year from secondary school to poly days that in an instance during that period of time, that poly years has ended ahaha. i looked back at myself and realised i did change some bits too. probably for the better. and i laugh at every stage of my life its been humbling experiences that helped me remain grounded. from the real da jie da (what. what's your problem. shut up. gui lan) till the huh oh so more reserved person ahaha. moving from authoritative to more autocratic style. hopefully to move to charismatic. and i dream of barrack obama. inspired. there's this aura in him. wadever. i could dream all day. glad and thankful i've come so far.

hoping to enjoy this weekend the anxiety is kicking in and all i can do is. prayers for recovery that the opt will be smooth lah, steady doc hands and speedy recovery for the patient. that's all i can do for her. watching from afar at times seems so safe but painful at times but yet many a times, its just to that, to how much people want your help. God get me through. :)

this is my new love. domo's out for now. go watch and support chang jiang 07. stephen chow is one frigging. cool creative fella. versatile not confined. and he knows how to tug the strings of your heart.

producer. scriptwriter. director. actor. now eat that mr jay chou. OWNZ. ahaha. GG. wadever. ahhh gahh i'm in love with the alien-doggie. its movie watch today wif jinyi, eric, carol, darius, me and my mom. ahaha. some kind of fun. *winks. 10 stars!! the magic of asian movies. which was the last one that captured me. was action and it was johnny to's exiled and another one called wo hu. hmm. yes. ahahaa and i can't resist "xiong di" lah. =D

i assure you when you walk out of the theatres, if you feel like you don't wanna own it ^ above. you may come over and bash me up. its that kind of feeling you know? ahaha great marketing introduction of product awareness. certainly have made the point known. full marks. YAHHHHHHHHHHH! i've been thinking of it, since i stepped out of the cinema. *sigh. wishing my da tou will become like ^. pretty far fetched. now dream on joyce. i'm a dreamer.

a domo a day. keeps the doctor away. bwahaha. my sis's idea. "say cheese" HAHAHAHA! =D she said anybody who comes to the blog should feel happy. and that's the whole idea. anyone who is feeling down should come to my blog. and come to blog and they will feel happy.

it'll be your sponge. TALK TO ME. I DON'T LIKE SPONGEBOB TO DOMO =D DOMO RULES =)

look ma no tripod. yes that is the emphasis. i don't know what took me so long to edit this pic and join them up. ahaha. and finally it is done. after weeks. finally that i have the time to sit down and have the feel. i'm such a feel person. ahaha.

i'm just feeling a pity that i took it so big to capture the details the one that rests on my desktop is so small. but the thing is that it has to be small so as to make it look sharp. i'm pretty proud of it. ahaha taken with a semi dslr. ahaha custom settings keke. but i think it was photoshop that made the best out of it. the one with the cam was such a bore. without tripod! yes that's the best and with the picture i went "zhor dang" there was this korean women that just went into my camera i had to crop her out of it. couple of heads ahaha and the resulting factor was this ahahaa.

and one more thing. i didn't know that my rmit marketing lecturer, mar comm lecturer, dr con stavros. is such a pretty big thing down under. big hoo hahs. cool dude and great writer. i can only *swoon* ahaha. tadah my pimped desktop.


can't say how much i love hong kong ahhaa all the shopping and photo taking. it couldn't have been better. and what have i been doing lately? someone's all over me in a sense, i'm bullied. and i'm letting it. we'll see where how much of this bully gets on. hah. give you face. and school has been pretty breezy for now. and driving. and church ahah pretty much. =) how sad miu kiu wai has to move over for some night scene on my desktop. ahahah. and the real pic.

*yawns. its first day of school. nothing much apart from the fact that every single lecture notes shall have to be downloaded and self printed. and the best part is SIM doesn't have excellent facilities as compared to TP. i really miss TP. the laserjet printers that are such a breeze and apparently don't seem to exist in my current school pfft. well i guess i just have to dump everything to the ultrasupplies and as a matter of fact, i don't think it will be cheap but i guess it will be cheaper as compared to self printing it on my kuku printer at home HAHAHA.

oh wells. anyways whatever with notes. *BURN. ahaha. kidding but i was playing with pictures again today. with my new watch! yay! been eyeing one for sometime and well it was with the voucher that one of the aunts gave me and tada. ahaha. i must be crazy but some shots of today.

the ferrari car! sexy. but wells, i still like my BMW Z4, black//red//silver. WHICHEVER. EH. my mobile pictures are getting better ar LOL. it is a mobile shot ahaha but whatever, of course with photoshop HAHAHA.
and these are my assets (taken with my canon PS) that looks so rich ahaha. but actually they are over time over long long time ahaha. and i realised when i was heading home on the bus when i went to get the watch, that my thingies are all black and i have this obssession with black. i just totally find it so sexxy. *drools ahaha. that my outfit today is black. and my glasses HAHAHA. shoes are white, my bag's white. ahaha. yes that's my previous police watch i got for myself last year, and another watch this year which is the casio's. muahaha, it looks expensive ahha or rather they both look expensive lah, but they're ok. i'm waiting to splurge on a HAMILTON. DANG. i'm waiting for that day ahaha.

so here's the new addition to my collection the new baby man. i'm still wearing it to get it seasoned ahaha. sickening me. my fettish with watch. i seriously wished i had more money ahaha. like i have so many hands ahaha. the calvin klein one i saw today was sexyyy dang. simple face, ahaha was it black. nicee. but oh wells. and as a matter of fact let me scare you, this shot is taken with my mobile phone on a stationary bus HAHAHA. of course again photoshopped ahaha. apparently the funny part is when i tried to take it with my bigger cam, the face doesn't appear. i think the mobile phones are seriously made to capture shots close up, the macro modes of both cams have such vast performance, i'm pretty shocked. THE BIG CAM LOSES TO THE SMALL MOBILE CAMS. or is SE phone's cam seriously that power. or my big cam doesn't have auto-focus. PFFT. DSLR PLS? =) last but not least. a self shot of me. for fun. with my mobile again ahaha. its fun destressing with cameras. and this shall be a self taken shot with my mobile again. fun =D posterish. poserish but all for fun. ahhaa =D

hello and i'm back. and i suppose i should have a change in fonts for a while since its the new year. to arial ahaha, from trebuchet. i love trebuchet but i mean for a change. and yes i've finally took the time to free myself.

ahaha i was back long time ago, after the hong kong trip but it just was crazy man. after coming back on the 7th dec, there was worship the next day. ahha, work on another week, there was Jane + Gary's wedding, then it was christmas. then last week was over at uncle henry + carol's place with their new house. hoo hoo.i couldn't seriously have time to just sit down and do all these pictures . either i'm zombed or too busy with the plentifuls like christmas shopping for the many dearies around me. wrapping preparation, time with everyone inclusive of family and friends. spent christmas, then boxing day came, slack around loads of drama watching, eating and sleeping during this period of time whenever i could find the time. i finally finished 60 episode long of "drive of life" which is some achievement ahaha. MIU KIU WAII!!! ahhhh, he makes me jello wobbly whenever he smiles. its a great show on life. i loveee it and seriously, in my sense, haven't found a show that has yet beat it in terms of content, (yes i'm content vulture happy now mr moo? you're no more emo boy la. anyhow. call yourself silly or uhm. mr moo? LOL) plot, character development, actors/actresses protrayal that had climax like D.O.L. rocks and kick ass. could go on like forever ahhaa. till it ended, kind of sad it ended but happy that i'm done with it ahaha.

i had alot to type initially before starting out my massive 2-3 hours of photoshopping which isn't much on picture edits but on the aesthetics of everything, the cropping, resizing, bordering, fonting, took me that long and yes the rotating. massive. i'm tired but i'm satisfied. my eyes are closing but no. justin's accompanying me on the pod. cause i'm blasting it through the phones in my ears from the ipod video. its my new toy ahaha well not exactly but its great stuff to meee. jacky cheung was accompanying me when i was feeling more feelingfuls. it kind of dissipated into thin air as i started all the photoshopping my mind seems to be in a blank. now that i'm pretty much exhausted.

looking back at the hong kong pictures, 85% of them are all shots by me, ahaha if you're wondering. apart from some self shots taken of me alone, are taken by others. whaha, mostly are self taken oh zhi lian kuang is my name. alot alot of shots but no way am i gonna upload every single one but just some highlights of my favourite shots. its fun photoshooting in the middle of the street as i was feeling terribly hungry, my shopping mode stopped and i started snapping CAMERA WHOREEE. WHOO. ok. yeah that's me. till i was done shopping it was time to head for dinner at some cha can ting whahaa. and have dinner i still remember cause i was obviously terribly hungry.

aftermath of the trip is seriously, i'm suffering from withdrawal symptoms that every single time i watch tvb dramas, i just relive the days there. the foods alright, shopping but i love their milk tea and gong zai mian. give me that every day. their beer is awesome too, ahaha blue girl and chips at night in the hotel room. people dress really well there, guys are cute, girls are pretty. indulge a little in their culture, the weather's so fine. i miss it really. and i'm dreaming of heading there to stay for sometime ahaa, haven't found myself loving any place that much. down under don't seem to please me, maybe after all, i'm rice-ed. yes kantang? ahaha. yes stop pushing me, i'm updating.

if you're just wondering what lately this girl is doing, isn't really much. on her holidays which her holiday is left to a final day today and i'm heading back to school on thursday (how excellent). all day long here's what i do. i repeat. she wakes up in the morning, brushes, heads over in front of the tele, and start her cable on channel 55. soon it'll probably be brunch. its ok, she gets bored of what's on cable, she switches on to www.crunchyroll.com and continues her tvb drama addiction. i'm mad. ahaha, and it can go on till cow knows. ungodly hours at night. till she decides "okay joyce that's enough" time to go sleep kind of thing and it repeats. ahaah, but to be exact its just the most 1-2 weeks of life like this. ahaha. before that was working at TMIS, for some 2 weeks and went off to hk =X ahaha. where the people and the boss there was really nice.

in all i'll just let the pictures do the talking. and then it was new year's right? it was double date to watch fire works at marina south, with the boy, and jinyi + eric. ahaa, k what crap, it was expensive and there weren't rooms it was like we were just meant to head and cramp up for the jam at marina south and it was 8 minutes of pleasure and joy just watching the fireworks and supper at mac @ bradell near jinyi's place. ahaha, and today another day of tv and food. man life's great like that but you know, you can't get too much of it, you'll scream of boredom. life. ahaha. i'm gonna sleep and enjoy my final day of the holidays, school really isn't that appeasing in a way, but i suppose it beats working. but then again, oh whatevers and come what mays.

thank God for 2007 as it draws to a close. crazy year, but i can only say, its been a hell of an emotional ride for me. alot of happenings and realisation lessons and "say what you say - now mean what you say" lessons for myself seriously. of letting go, releasing, accepting, believing and hoping times. been through it all, can't say i'm all grown up but i can say i feel older. going through all the experiences, and above all, thank God for lovely people around.

friends that can brave weather and storms with you, that when you break in front of a computer, you can still be comforted by the person across. people who have been praying behind the scenes, caring, sending words of encouragement, looking out for me. lending a helping hand when i'm down. and that very one who sits, listens, throws an arm over your shoulder and cry together. every pillar of support around and to God who have made everything possible. i fall, i fail, i weep, i cry, i break. but i think its the courage built to stand up time and time again to get your feet on the ground, keep it grounded. and face the obstacles head on, once, twice or time and time again, till you learn.

good or bad through every single thing that has happened this year, i'm thankful. you take the good, you take the bad. cause at the end of the day, if life had choices, and made you choose if you want only the good and not the bad, i'll still take everything that had happened. cause without the bad, you'll never learn how inadequate i myself can be, inapt, unable that i am able to realise where i'm lacking of, and learn to look on the things that i already have and feel blessed. and use your strengths to help in the learning of the inapts. and be thankful of. the fact of realisation and a deeper sense in a way, i cannot be without my faith ahaha. and my God. one of the toughest years in this handful of years i feel. but i'm glad i came out of it.

to all of you out there, have a blessed 2008, that you all will be blessed with good health, with love, peace, joy and hope in every single day of your life. No matter what challenges may come what may, hold on. and when you feel the entire world's falling. no one's loving, no ones listening, Jesus loves you. =) God bless and have a great year ahead + dreams come true. heh heh.
oh i love this one taken of my da jie. ^ yes yes me and my ideas with street photography. feels mv like? that's the whole idea ahaha. =D niteys people. first day of work of the year.

Oh its been some aeons that i've been blogging but life has been rough last week. from last sunday, its been a rather rough patch. but thank God for lovely people. seriously lovely people, people who watched me break, listen to me, encouraged me, hugged me, patted me and say "its ok you did well".

lovely people like my cousin's mom known as "sui yi" smallest aunt in another words. kim yee, darius and winnie! have been the core people who nursed me back to my today's highness. that highness brought back the childness that i was kidding with him. omo! but yes. its the joy and the gratefulness that i'm back.

its been hectic one moment i was at Pastor Edwin + Sharon's wedding, having a great time, and come sunday, i was weeping with him. i had to choke back tears during worship ahaha otherwise it'll look like i'm crying over someone dead. but i was breaking of the difficulties i was facing, tired of the same situations, that came back which was healed, but the pains came back haunting me. no worries its healed. ahaha. better and stronger than before.

i broke not cause of anything, but helpless when you try your best, but the outcome haven't changed one bit. but its ok, i've looked on the bright sides and i've bounced back. looking and witnessing them getting married. whoa. ahaha. :) and i was there at another moment snapping pictures of the both of them. i tell you i was frigging pai seh can. WHY? cause every single person in front of the church was with full DSLR cam's kit, lens on, flash light on, body kit on, and their lenses are va va voom? and there i was with my NON DSLR, its a semi DSLR with no power lenses, just a 12x optical default zoom, S3IS powershot, how old? and only 5 meg when people are going up to no lah, not very high 8mp? but never mind all the shoovings of "GOOO LAH" of pushings from faithful people like Jessie and Darius, me and Jessie had a fun time just snapping shots.

i promise i will burn the pictures ahaha onto CDS. cause seriously the problem with me is that i always take forever to upload the pictures but it will come with constant chase. ahaha :) thank you all. and so the gift in my mind was something like that. came out ok la, but to see the "whoa its very nice" from the couple today after giving it to them, i felt safe. cause in the beginning i wasn't totally confident. but well the work is loved. and i feel loved and thank you. the below picture is taken by my cellphone.

anyway the brotherhood picture is also taken by me. ahaha, no show offs, i didn't do much, thank the boys who know how to pose. i just change my angle, cute right? MY DA JIE loves Neo hahaah. i shall not reveal which is Neo ahaha. My sister -_-' but i like the picture, so brother brother, (after all the brotherhood movies i've been watching) lovely picture. lovely pose.

and for the final picture if many are curious how the boy looks without hair, (to be honest i couldn't be used to him without his styled hair) but as i look back at the picture i come to realise hey, he looks not bad too without hair. he went down abit this week after being sick, but no worries, least his fever isn't that bad i hope. his in his black button shirt and me in my red turtle neck, our outfits to the wedding. the more i look at our picture, the more hello. are we brother and sister? HAHAHA. hilarious.

but the smile on our faces is just to tell really how grateful i've been for him. for your sweetness, thoughtfulness, caringness. his army days has been one of our best moments together. appreciating each other's busy-ness and the army getting that "get down moving" attitude has been hell of a help :) the times spent this weekend was great too :) basically alot of resting. for him. ahaha and i was busy doing the frame up work.

but after so much, its time to leave off again with my camera. to hong kong with xiao lao hu, my da jie and my mom. long story. time to enjoy.

and i shall say how God's been grate to me. for the job, great boss, great in charge. lovely pay. and a 2nd hand ipod video dealer, and a buyer for my amp and guit. HAHA. and a buyer for the ipod mini. everything has been so smooth. despite hiccups. God's been great.